feeling so socialy inept after m/c

[babyonboard]

Today has been the final straw that has made me think, okay it hasn't been so long, but when will I stop being scared to see people I haven't seen in a while in case they mention it.!? And when will I get over it, when I feel I have internaly but when it comes to the crunchh, i haven't atall..Do I need to seek proffesional help or is this just a process I need to go through internally?

I am so pissed off with myself, why would I be scared to meet up with people I know will be supportive and would themselves be upset to think I thought otherwise. Indeed to not do something i've been loooking forward to since last week, and might well be what I needed to bing me out of my gloomy shell.

Thing is I don't think that they would 'judge' or be bothered , even if I turned up in tears, these are lovely , lovely people that I have met and spoken to before, but then, seeing them with their small children around is different. In those circumstances you have to be careful with what you say, as small children have huge ears!

I think I want life to continue as normal , but it's been tricky times in our life even life outside the misscarriage, and often at home with DP we keep up pretences , perhaps for our own sanity in face of the sheer neccesity to be so!

Argh, I'm not making much sense, but please, when can things go back to the usual!?

[Kelly1978]

I have no experience to offer, but bumping up for you as I didn't want it to drop out of active convos.

[Olihan]

Sorry you're going through this. I've got no experience either but have you tried talking to the miscarriage association people? I'll find the no for you.

[wheelybug]

Hi BoB

I had a m/c 2 weeks ago at about 7 weeks. I think yours was considerably later ?

I know I have found it much easier to 'get on with things' because people didn't know and not having people ask me about it. Thats not much help to you as, being further on, obviously people knew. I guess I just wanted to say that I think it is very normal to feel as you do in your circumstances.

The first week I had when I tried to get back to normal I found really hard - I didn't really want to go out and when I did I felt a bit wobbly (emotionally). This week has felt much better. So, given that yours was 'worse' as it was later
I guess it will just take time (a crappy old cliche but true I think).

sorry if thats not been any help and is just a load of old waffle....

[Olihan]

Miscarriage Association
Clayton Hospital
Northgate
Wakefield
WF1 3JS
Tel: 01924 200799
Information, advice and support


Their website is here

[DippyHippy]

hey B.O.B

me again, and again i know exactly what you mean - i had to take one of the dogs to the vet today and almost had a panic attack thinking they might say something that i might not know how to respond to. whn i walk the dogs i am constantly looking over my shoulder incase i see someone.

what i'm dreading is when the boys go back to school - i cant stand the thought of people expecting to see me 20 weeks pregnant, and i'm obviously not - then they'll gove me the symathetic looks, then they wont know what to say to me and will start ignoring me!!! AAAARRRGHGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!

sorry - thats not helpful is it!!!!

perhaps what i should say is what my father in law said to me - we should have used a condom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

big love to you xxxxxxxxxxxx

[megglevache]

Message withdrawn

[DippyHippy]

full moon today!!!!!

makes EVERYTHING wonky!!!!

xxxxxxxxxxxx

[babyonboard]

feeling much better today, maybe theres something in that full moon thing!

must force myself to get out and about more...

[megglevache]

Message withdrawn

[babyonboard]

Glad to hear you're feeling cheerier too!
And thanks to everyone for your messages of support. I came to the realisation that I will, and should expect, to act a little crazy right now, and it's just going to be a long process to deal with.

xxxx