seeing consultant tomorrow - don't know what to say to him

[desperatehousewife]

Seeing my consultant tomorrow which will be the first time since he told me my baby had died (a month ago nearly) and am feeling very nervous - don't know what to ask etc. These appointments are like gold dust and I don't want to cock it up by forgetting to ask stuff or not asking the right stuff.

I'll make a list of q's to take with me tomorrow - but am panicking a bit at mo and can't think properly!

Guess I need to ask what test are/have been done - can additional tests be done privately?

any ideas about how to get my mind working, gratefully recieved!

[FN]

DHW so sorry for your loss and upset. You are doing the right thing about making a list and take this with you and check you ask them all.

Are they or have they done a post mortem? this maybe be the centre of one of the questions.

To get your mind flowing, maybe get some paper and put all your thoughts, worries and feelings on it and branch off those with any further thoughts or feelings and questions??

Best of luck at the appointment and I do hope you get some answers.

[oinker]

DHW,

I feel for you as I was in your shoes not so long ago.

They will offer to do the genetic blood tests on you and some blood tests on your DH.

You need to make sure they are done at the right time. (after your first period)
Ask about HSG xray.. Checks the uterus (womb) and fallopian tubes.
Ask about the histology report.
How long will all investigation take?
Will it all be done locally?

You have the right idea...
Make sure all your questions are written done.

Good luck...

[desperate2bmum]

hi all

i found out my baby had died on wednesday through a scan i should have been 12 weeks but it died at 8.
fortunately i misacrried naturally and didnt need any other medical attention. i simply got sent home and told to rest for a few days.

i am still bleeding now should i go back?

x

[desperatehousewife]

i'm so sorry about your news - i have no idea about the bleeding i have never had a natural miscarriage. Post a thread under miscarriage as there are sadly a lot of women who have been through the same as you. My guess is that it is totally normal to still be bleeding.

[desperatehousewife]

oinker - you are amazing - you are so practical and I really truly appreciate all the thoughts and advice you are giving me - I just hope you had someone do the same for you when you were going through it all.

What's a histology report?

x

[oinker]

DHW..

I am glad I can be of some help.

Histopathology report would be the report from the lab regarding tissue analysis from your D&C.
The lab would have done a report on the tissue removed.
Make sure they explain their findings (if any) to you.

Try and remember that if they have not found any reasons for the m/c, though frustrating, this is a good thing.

GOOd Luck.x

[desperatehousewife]

oinker - i didn't have a D&C - I bloody wish I had. The bastards made me give birth....but i guess there will be tissue samples from that too.

I've been told Post mortem results won't be ready for 6 weeks (which is another 3 weeks away).

[oinker]

DHW,

There still should be some report available. I think they say 6 weeks to cover themselves.
I was told six weeks too but checked two weeks after D&C and they had the results. It took them a week to sort out the fax to my GP though!!!
The report was dated 15.05.06 I had my D&C on the 12th May...
Ask, it may be ready.

Good luck for today. x

[Rosiesgirl]

Hi,

I had a termination at 21 weeks after identification of fatal genetic disorder, and like you gave birth to my son.

They also said 6 weeks for the post mortem but I had interim results available to me through the consultant after 4 weeks and Christmas was in between. It may be worth checking...

Also, it may seem an odd question, but ask what they didn't / weren't able to test for. Sometimes thats as telling as what they did test for.

Good luck!

[oinker]

DHW,

How did you get on?

[desperatehousewife]

bless you oinker for remembering! It was fine - he was lovely and kind and gentle and thoughtful. he made no promises and had no answers, but he answered my quesions as well as he could. I didn't have a d&c because they wouldn't have been able to do a postmortem. He's refering me to St Mary's and to a place in Epsom to look at killer cells and he took blood today to check for aps and thyroid.

So i feel like we've moved on a little bit.

I cried in there which was to be expected and he said " I'm glad to see you crying because you were so stoic on the day" - i felt like saying "yes but you only saw me for 5 mins on the day to fit my drip first thing in the morning, then you buggered off and I haven't seen you sine".

ANyway, I go back in another month to get pm results.

phew, glad it's over for now. Feel wobbly but ok.

Thanks
xxxxxx

[oinker]

DHW,

This is where the new journey begins. I am sure you will receive the best possible care.
I know the wait for St Marys seems long but it'll be worth it. On a more positive note, someone on the waiting list may get p/g and will have to opt out. Your appointment could be sooner than you think.
You will need every test result from all your pg's for St Marys. Ask for as much as you can now. I was told that the more info I could provide the better it was.They will send you a lengthy questionaire asking about your medical history . They will also need family pregnancy history down to you and your partners siblings.
Dates for all p/g, any treatment during it and gestation. Birth complications the lot. You will need to get hold of your blood group. This is a tricky one. I knew mine and they accepted it. My GP sent of for confirmation of my blood group (he added a sample) and they refused to do it. It boils down to costings.

Good Luck x

[MABS]

much love DHW, was wondering about that appt too xxxx

[bundle]

dhw, glad to see things are moving, seems pretty throrough, xxxxxxx