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Bereavement

No more cards

5 replies

madasa · 09/03/2013 10:41

It's my birthday tomorrow.

Some birthday cards have just come in the post. I picked one up and looked at the handwriting and smiled thinking 'that's dad's card'

My dad died 16 months ago....I will never get another birthday card/hug from him.

I miss him

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grants1000 · 09/03/2013 11:37

I know just what you mean, my Dad died 14 years ago and I still think this, my birthday is on Monday - Happy Birthday to you!

I miss my Dad to, but it does get easier, the pain is still there and only bubbles up from time to time, less often and I can take real comfort and care from remembering the times we had together, which I found very hard to do in the early years since his death. Of course it's no substitute for having here now, but it is comforting.

I still post my Dad a birthyday card, I like posting a card into a letter box, with just the words Dad on it, it's just a quirky thing I do, no one knows expcept you, it marks the day and occasion for me.

My Dad would be so pissed off with me if I spent my birthday being blue, he loved birthdays, especially cake so I always have a cake and eat a slice for him!

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scottishmummy · 09/03/2013 11:41

It's hard isn't it you put on good face,and its the unexpected stuff gets you
That's when is hard that lack of ongoing contact or reference
Look after yourself on birthday,do think of your dad but don't dwell

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ssd · 09/03/2013 20:29

I'm sorry op Sad

my mum died 6 months ago and it was birthday 2 weeks after she died. All I got in the post that day was the bill for her funeral.

sm, dwelling is all I do, only time will stop that

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madasa · 11/03/2013 08:33

Thank you for your kind replies.

Grants I think sending your dad a card is a lovely thing to do.

ssd so sorry to hear you have lost your mum....it's so painful isn't it? I am a little further along the road than you. I can honestly say that it has got a little better in that I spend less time being overwhelmed by my grief. However when it does wash over me it is still just as raw and agonising.

I had a lovely day though....spoilt by my dd and my dp.

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scottishmummy · 11/03/2013 19:12

Sad,be kind to yourself and gently introduce distraction/activity so you don't dwell too much

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