They are fairly close. She loves to visit every time we can. She went to him first out of the great grandparents when they came to see her as a crawling baby and he has always been proud of her.
Now he is dying in hospital and we are waiting for the call. My dad is with him. He is 93, and unconscious, which he has been since a fall early Thursday.
His wife (my grandma) will not visit him. She says he would not like her to see him like that and she is right. She is also 93, is quite poorly, and is giving up without him. She's very confused and spends all day and all night in her armchair, she doesn't know day from night, despite having carers, district nurse visits, my mum popping in, etc. She doesn't understand what's happening (the memory nurse says she does not have dementia, but this is not the real her).
Sorry, I wanted to give some background, but it is a bit upsetting for me. I'm 33 and still have 3 of my grandparents, I've never been through this before, I know I am lucky.
How on earth do I tell my DD1? Have looked on Winston's Wish, and we have "Badger's Parting Gift" which is perfect for her because she loves Brambley Hedge, Beatrix Potter etc, but I don't know what words to use. I don't want to get it wrong.
Do we tell her he's really too poorly to get better? Or do we wait until after?
My mum's dad died when I was 4 and I remember asking "why" and being told he was ill in the winter and that's why. I was scared every time anyone was ill in the winter they would die - what they actually meant was "remember when he was ill last winter, well he was still poorly from that illness again and he couldn't get better". Wording is everything - she is so bright she will have questions I can't answer.
Can anyone help with this? Thank you.
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Bereavement
My grandpa is dying. How do I tell my 4yo DD ?
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pookamoo · 16/02/2013 21:13
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