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Bereavement

Struggling with loss of dmil

3 replies

mummynumnum · 19/01/2013 20:01

My mil died after a long 2yr battle with secondary breast cancer that went to her stomach. Her death in the end was peaceful and expected. We have all coped very well and I think we have prob all felt v numb. However, these last few weeks I am beginning to struggle. I really miss her. I miss my friend and someone who helped me cope so much with being a ft working mum of 2. I think about her all the time now and I am beginning to feel q emotional. My dh and his siblings are coping so well (I know they are prob hiding it) that I feel I cant burden them with my feelings. I am not sure what advice I am looking for but I wanted to just share my feelings.

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BouncyPenguin · 19/01/2013 21:03

I'm very sorry to hear about your MIL. It's lovely that you were so close and regarded her as your friend. That is such a blessing. When you feel it is the right time you may want to share your feelings with your DH. He may appear to be coping well but may also, as you suspect, be concealing his real emotions. It may be what you both need to talk about her and how much you both miss her. What advice do you think your MIL would give to you if she were here?

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madasa · 20/01/2013 07:44

So sorry for you loss.

My dp adored my dad who died 15 months ago. Sometimes when I am upset or even if we are just talking about him my dp will cry and tell me how much he misses him (they used to chat motorbikes a lot Smile

I can honestly say I don't feel burdened. I am glad that he can tell me how he feels. It somehow makes my own grief easier when we share it.

I think I'm just trying to say (in a very clumsy way) that perhaps if you open up to your dh it may give him the chance to share his feelings. He may not say much for fear of upsetting you....us humans are strange creatures.

There will always be support for you here too.

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madasa · 20/01/2013 07:45

*your

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