Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters.

1 2

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters.

Bereavement

Mum has gone

30 replies

Dunnyjo · 01/02/2006 11:13

2 weeks today my mum collapsed with a sevear stroke. She died on the friday night. It was so sudden., i am in shock. She was only 57. The whole family was round her bed sidde when she passed away. I cant get it out of my head watching her struggling to breathe like that knowing she was going.
None of us for one minuste ever thought she would die. I just cant belive she has gone from my life, one minute there happy (saw her nearly everyday) spoke to her about 6 times a day on the phone. One minute i am totally numb and its not registering that she has gone the next i am crying uncontrolably shaking. It hits me in the stumock every time. My poor dad will be lost without her (together for 42 yrs) My son (2 in March) keeps asking for his granny, i am also 6 months pregnant and scared. Mum is not going to be there.

OP posts:

Report

foundintranslation · 01/02/2006 11:14

I'm so very sorry dunnyjo.

LilacBump · 01/02/2006 11:14

i'm so sorry to hear of your loss

bm3sm2 · 01/02/2006 11:16

Really sorry to hear of your mums death. I can't really give you advice as I have not experienced this yet but just wanted to say how sorry I am for you and hope that things get easier for you with time. Good luck with your new little one. x

pepperpots · 01/02/2006 11:16

Am so sorry for your loss i dont really know what else to say but i couldnt read leave this thread without posting

Aero · 01/02/2006 11:18

I am so very sorry for your loss. What a terrible shock for you all and huge loss. She was so young. I don't know what to say, but will hold you in my thoughts. Take Care, Aero xx

trace2 · 01/02/2006 11:18

so sorry i felt just the same when i lost my mum, i saw her everyday, and like you always on the phone to her, my ds was 18 months when we lost her, its so hard to bear, all i can say is ((hugs )) to you.

Dunnyjo · 01/02/2006 11:21

i just have no idea what to do with myself. I have been out the house every day but today i dont even want to get dressed. I take 5 min at a time and deal with that. I am jut totally lost

OP posts:

trace2 · 01/02/2006 11:24

yes i know and youll feel like this for a while, but what kept me going is being strong for my dad, it does get better in time, but we never forget

cathyspam · 01/02/2006 11:27

hi pet, my mum died aged only 43 and it is a horrible shock - we were also gathered round her bed watching her take those last breaths and for a while that is all i could picture but it does get easier after a while - you hsve to try your best to remember all the good memories, the wise things she taught you and one day you will be able to think of her with a smile. I still get very sad at times about the fact that she did not get to meet her grandchildren but strongly feel that she has been 'around' helping me get through a lot of difficult times - i am a much stronger person and more like my mum than i used to be and i think that is because she is with me somehow. You need to talk about this with friend and family and i hope that one day you are able to think of her with a smile. (((hugs)))

choccywoccydoodaa · 01/02/2006 11:37

Dunnyjo - feel so sad for you. This is such a difficult time, particularly being pregnant too. Somehow, you will get through this even if it feels impossible now. I lost my Dad 12 weeks ago so I know where you are - it all seems so incredible. There is always lots of support on Mumsnet so post whenever you feel like it and let us know how you are.

I will be thinking of you...

ernest · 01/02/2006 18:57

I am so very sorry. What a huge and indiscribable shock. You'll get lots of support here. Poor ds. You'll get through it. Hope you get plenty of support with your new little one. Take care xxxx

sunchowder · 01/02/2006 19:06

Dunnyjo, so sorry for your loss. I lost my Mum in 1991 and I can still remember how raw I was for such a very long time. Be kind to yourself if you can and let yourself grieve. It is such a shock even if you Mum was not well, we are never ready to lose our parents. If you can try to focus on your loved ones and come on here for support. It is still such early days for you, it will get better over time.

Rhubarb · 01/02/2006 19:11

It sounds like you had a very good relationship with your mum, that is something to celebrate. It does leave a huge hole when somebody is gone, but somehow you find the strength to carry on, and she is never gone for good. She is a part of you just as you were a part of her. Some of her lives on in you and in your children.

Cry by all means, it helps. It's only been 2 weeks so the grief is still raw, but it will ease. She touched so many peoples lives and you had something special, that mother-daughter bond that some of us have never experienced, treasure that. Your life is enriched because of her, so make sure that her memory lives on in you and your children.

NotQuiteCockney · 01/02/2006 19:17

I'm really sorry for your loss.

Cristina7 · 01/02/2006 19:31

So sorry to read of your loss, Dunnyjo.

cloe2jay · 01/02/2006 19:41

Sorry to hear about your loss. ((((BIG HUG)))))))

Gypwil · 20/08/2006 17:01

I know how you feel, my mum became seriously ill a few days after my first child was born and died a few weeks later, I was juggling looking after a newborn with sitting with my mum in hospital. She died 8 weeks ago and I'm still distraught, don't think I'll ever get over it!

Cam · 20/08/2006 17:30

Sorry to hear that news Gypwil

sleepysooz · 20/08/2006 17:41

Can't begin to think how you must be feeling, try and think that you are enriched by your mum's life, my cousin lived with us when her mum died, she was only 3 so she never knew her, and she still suffers today, so take your memories of your mum and hold on to them, you have them, you have memories of your mum!

Only time will heal the sadness but in a few years or even sooner depending on how long it takes you personally, cause everyone is different and you take how ever long you like to grieve there are no rules, you will feel that warmth back when you have a special memory to relay to your children.

Californifrau · 20/08/2006 18:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lemmingswife · 20/08/2006 18:11

I am so sorry, Dunnyjo.
XXXXX

SherlockLGJ · 20/08/2006 18:13

DunnyJo's post was in February, think Gypwil clicked on it because she could empathise with DunnyJo.

Californifrau · 20/08/2006 18:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

7up · 20/08/2006 18:20

so sorry for your loss

Lemmingswife · 20/08/2006 18:21

I didn't notice the date. Hope you are coping ok, Dunnyjo.
Gypwil, I am so sorry you are also going through this.

Flip

1 2

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.