LOL at Cory.....gotta be honest some DH's probably need to be kept on a rein

14?!

I am a naturally vague person myself, so I am very grateful to my parents for encouraging me to become independent in my teens, sailing on my own, travelling to the next town, cooking family meals unsupervised. Otherwise I am afraid I might have been dangerously vague by now. I want dd to know that she cannot walk around in a permanent day dream: that's why I let her take little brother into town; I want her to learn responsibility before she hits whatever university she may be going to.

lucygreen, would you put your dh on a rein too?

Because frankly to me, a 14yo is someone who is growing up and should be able to cope even if she does get separated from her parents in an airport.

My 12yo goes into town on her own (health permitting) or in charge of little brother. If I lost her in London or at an airport (we do travel a fair bit) I would expect her to behave in the same sensible way as I would if I got separated from dh, i.e. make my way to an information point and have them make an announcement on the tannoy. Surely that should be well within the scope of a 12, let alone a 14yo?

By the time I was 16 I was staying alone in a hotel in a foreign city for a weekend.

To me, it's not about fear of embarrassing an older child: it's about letting them grow up believing that Mummy will do all the thinking so they never need to do any of their own. We live in a university town- I'd like mine to be rather more capable than some of the students I see around.

But totally agree that I would not leave toddler alone in a car.

Really agree with curly

with the only caveat being that I think there is disagreement about where the greatest risk lies.

I think, depending on the temprement of the kids involved, it is potentially quite dangerous to walk them across the petrol forecourt.

And I don't think there is much additional risk of a car spontaneously combusting at a petrol station, compared to, say, when driving along at 70mph. Cars ARE dangerous.

Normally, I think a child will be fine for ten minutes in a locked car. This fear of abduction-the only way to get to that child would be to break into the car, which would attract some attention, surely? Its not likely to happen on a busy high street, the commotion required would hardly make the child an easy target.

curly summed up in a sentence.....end of thread....

abraid! I suppose some of us asked for that!

I think the only thing that can be said about people on this thread is that some are very cautious and others less so. The cautious ones will never understand how the less cautious can "take a risk", whereas the less cautious just don't see there's any risk to take in the first place.

Hey ho.....

I only ever left my son in the car, locked, whilst I went to pay for petrol and avoided that if I possibly could.
I only started leaving my son in the, locked, car whilst I nipped into the local shop (car parked directly outside the door) and no longer than 2 mins when he was old enough to understand where I was and that I would be back very soon. I still avoided it if I could though and constantly checked through the window.
I never left him asleep in the car outside our home. Just couldn't do it - did try very briefly once though.
I'm the kind of person who thinks the worst thing may well happen, so I do accept that I am over cautious about many things!

I'm stunned that some of you thought it was safe to leave children of any age in a room without you there. Aren't you aware of the risks of spontaneous combustion?

I can't answer the question in regards to your younger children as I don't know anything about you, being a parent is a learning curve you might decide to do it the same or in a few years you may feel differently and therefore do things differently, thats not something me or anyone else on here can predict, all I will say is do whatever as a parent you feel most comfortable with, it doesnt need the approval of anyone other than yourself.