My daughters so scared all of the time- is this normal?

[horseshoe]

I dont know whats happened. She is just coming up to 4 and the last few months she has become a bit girlie. But it's getting out of hand. She seems to have panic attacks over all sorts of things. We paid to watch the disney on ice show recently and when they dimmed the lights to start the show she completely freaked. So much so that she was scaring the children around us and so we had to remove her before the show even started and we missed it. Yet she sleeps in the dark no problems
At disneyland she refused to go on any rides. Literally screaming if we tried to put her on any.
If there is fighting on TV she will walk out of the room and sit on the stairs. I'm not talking street fighter stuff but light kids programmes / coronation street. She then spends hours asking questions about acting and how it all works.
She is scared stiff of the disney programmes because of the wicked stepmothers and again asks loads of questions.
She hasn't had any trauma at home and the only change to her routine is that she started nursery in September.
Please can someone please tell me this is normal for her age? I know her analysing is but she is so genuinely scared of everything and only me or her dad can calm her. She is an extremely outgoing child otherwise more so than many I have met and so I just dont understand this underlyinf fear and I dont know how to solve it. All I say at the moment is that me and Daddy would never put her at risk which she accepts and understands but because of the sheer panic cant face doing anything.

[Melly]

Hi Horseshoe, this is a difficult one. I seem to remember my dd going through a similar stage, she is now 5 and she just seemed to grow out of that phase. She didn't have such extreme reactions as your dd, but she certainly seemed to be frightened of her own shadow at that age, wouldn't go on rides, wouldn't climb etc etc. Not sure what to advise really, is there any pattern to the behaviour or is it just any situation? I think sometimes you more you try to find a reason the harder it becomes although I am sure it is quite distressing for you. In my experience trying to get their confidence up by pushing them to do things they are scared of just makes the situation worse, so we just tried to avoid situations that we knew would make dd fretful and gradually she came out of it. She now has stacks more confidence, although I think she will always be a "girlie" girl if you know what I mean, but that's just part of her character and I remember being like that as a child. Hopefully she will gradually get her confidence back and all you can really do is reassure her and stay calm. Hope this helps a little bit and sorry not to be able to offer any really constructive advice.

[framan]

Horseshoe, you are not alone. DD1 went through a similar phasse between the age of 3 and 4 and it was very distressing. She had a real phobia about going into shops with loud music even at ToysRus! Parties were hard work because of the loudness. It was a noise issue but she was also scared of going on merry go rounds. We also had the same problem at Disneyland where she refused to go on any rides! But I think it was a phase as she started to become much more aware of her surroundings and the more familiar they became she started to relax and just shrugged them off. This summer she started going on rides and a strange one, she started to dry her hands under the handdryer without screaming her head off. She is now 5 and three quarters and things are getting easier. Not much help here but hope I've given you some reassurance that she will grow out of it. Just be patience and just be guided by her. I think we just persevered and she just got used to them. Good luck anyway.