My daughter was 2 in January. This is what bedtime looks like:
- CBeebies bedtime story
- Tell daddy (or me) night night
- Cheerfully go up the stairs to brush teeth
- Cheerfully go up the stairs from there to go to bedroom
- Happily put on pajamas
- Happily crawl in bed to have a book or two read.
- Scream ABSOLUTELY BLOODY MURDER as soon as Daddy or I leave the room -- usually this lasts around 10 minutes.
This has been happening since LAST AUGUST. At first I just left her to it, but it seemed to get worse.
We have tried everything: no CBeebies/TV at all (makes no appreciable difference), more light (she categorically says TURN IT OFF), music (makes no appreciable difference), staying with her for a while (keeps her awake and then simply delays the screaming), staying with her until she is asleep (meaning she won't sleep for around an hour and a half, making the next day harder), altering bedtime to be earlier and later (neither makes any difference), and shortening/skipping daytime nap (screaming still happens, but is shorter in duration).
What seems to result in the least screaming and earliest sleep time is going back to the original scheme of just leaving her to it. She gets out of bed, screams and cries at her doorway (which we ignore), then gets in bed and goes to sleep.
Now, this is a child who I never let "cry it out" or anything when she was a baby. I remember the specific date she started doing this (it was the August bank holiday) and it happened overnight. Before that she was a beautiful sleeper who happily let me out her down in bed awake and walk away without a sound. In August she hit 20 months, and when I have googled about this, it appears there is some sort of sleep regression then, but most people seem to get over the hump within a few weeks.
Sometimes the screaming is so heartrending that it makes me cry too--but I know if I go up, it ultimately always makes it worse for her one way or another. And, as I say, it's 10 minutes.
Basically I am wondering how normal or abnormal this is, and whether I should just be sitting with her so she doesn't cry, even though that does badly impact her overall amount of sleep. I don't want to damage her tiny psyche and make her feel abandoned, yet leaving her, on the face of it, seems to have the best outcome.
Any thoughts welcome.