really bothered by 6 y/o

[worriedandashamed]

i'm a regular who has name changed because i'm so bothered about about what my six year old did today.Have had friends round with their 4 year old daughter.She and my ds were playing upstairs when my ds came running downstairs in just his underpants shouting that he was tarzan( this is pretty usual-he's always being tarzan).My friends daughter then followed him down laughing her head off and shouting that ds had showed her his willy and said to touch it, and then trying to pull her pants down and saying 'look at my willy'.
i was absolutely mortified. i pulled ds away into another room and told him he must get dressed and to remember that willies were private and i didn't ever want to see him do this again, and he could get into real trouble with a policeman for behaviour like this.
I apologised profusely to my friend who was pretty cool about it and said her daughter was too young to understand.

I don't know where he has picked up this kind of thing.I don't know if this a thing to worry about .i don't know if i handled it badly/right/whatever.
My tummy is lurching.
what do i do?

[foxinsocks]

mmm doesn't sound too unusual to me - my 4 yr old ds behaves like that a bit especially if he has got overexcited (showing off his willy). Dd's boy friends (who are mainly 6) seem to have mainly passed this phase of willy showing off but maybe your boy just got a bit overexcited?

[foxinsocks]

I think it's worth taking him aside and telling him that it's ok for him to play with his penis in the comfort of his own room but that he is the only one who should touch it and that it's his private bits - just like girl's bits are their private bits.

[worriedandashamed]

he knows that willies are private. and he does think it's funny to runa round flashing it at home.
but the whole touching thing has freaked me out.

[foxinsocks]

was it because it had gone hard (sorry for being ultra graphic) - I have seen a few young boys who get a bit amazed at their hard ons and want others to have a good examination of their bits when it happens?

[worriedandashamed]

i don't know.

i know that he and his brother are always comparing willies in the bath so maybe he thought it was the same. do you think i'm worrying about this too much?

i have 2 possibilities in my mind;1-that it's a sign that he is going to end up being anti -social and in trouble with police.
2;that it is a sign that someone else is introducing him to inappropriate behaviours.

[foxinsocks]

no I don't think you are worrying about it too much but I think you can cross off number 1 from your list straight away!

I think if he is used to getting his willy out all the time at home with his brother or just round the house then it's a natural extension that he's going to do it when friends are there. Tbh, he just sounds like a boy who is comfortable with his own naked body (iyswim).

If you are worried about no.2, then you could always have a chat with him but (and I'm no expert) I think you have to worry more when they are displaying adult sexual behaviour as a child and getting your willy out for your friend (even if he did ask her to touch it, and you only have her word on this and she is only 4) doesn't sound like anything major to me.

[foxinsocks]

but I do think it's worth a clarifying talk with him - when it's calm at home, perhaps when it is just the two of you on your own about how it's not appropriate to let other people touch his private bits

[colditz]

Sounds like a little boy who is just dead impressed with the feats of his own willy, and wanted to demonstrate to his friend.

[Flossam]

At the end of the day it is his little body and he is just getting used to what he's got and what it does. I wasn't that much older when a boy and I used to have a 'show me yours' arrangement in the coat room!! I think you are right to tell him that only he should touch it. However I don't really think telling him he is going to get in trouble for his body is the right way to go about things as I think this may instill negative connitations {sp}. I don't think implying his actions to be illegal are going to create a healthy attitude. He sounds like a normal little boy to me - he is after all male and they are all obsessed with their bits and always will be! It is a huge leap to imply that because of his behaviour today he is going to be a vagrant. He is perfectly normal I am quite sure!

[Quadrophenia]

Stop panicing its all very normal you really don't need to be worried or ashamed x

[worriedandashamed]

i could bite mt tongue off for saying that about the policeman.
dh is going to have a chat about keeping things private with him.

thank you for your reassurances.
he is such a lovely little boy really.this just made me panic and worry.