DS is 3. He's rather charming :) but my god, he is hard bloody work. I am at the point where I just don't know how much more I can take and am starting to worry that there's something pathological to his behaviour .
He just has a slightly manic quality to his behaviour most of the time. he has to fiddle, with everything all the time. He has a zero tolerance threshold for boredom - the instant he is fed up of something he just starts to screech and howl and grizzle and throw things. Shopping is a fucking nightmare, he kicks shelves from the buggy (sometimes people too, the shame the shame), grabs things, throws things. Matters not a jot if we've been to the park first - he is almost impossible to tire out and tbh when he is tired he is worse and more manic.
When he's tired or bored, he hits me, kicks me, headbutts me. I try to be consistent with discpline for this sort of thing but he doesn't effing care about anything I try.... Last time I did the whole 'get down to his level' thing, he headbutted me in the face. Shutting him in his room is pointless, he likes being in there and once he gets bored he can get out anyway. He can escape the straps on the buggy so that is useless too. Plus, I don't want be fighting him like that all the time, I don't want to be pushing him away so I end up just ignoring him because it feels like fuck all works so I might as well just not bother. He's fine, so long as he is doing exactly what he wants when he wants to...
He gets hysterical very fast when overstimulated - toddler groups were a nightmare so we stopped going. He just seemed unable to relax and play, it was always constant shrieking and grabbing and hitting (I was the mother of that toddler, sorry everyone).
He ends up watching TV a lot because it is the only way he will sit still and stop being nuts. I hate it and would rather have him poddling round with me 'helping' but that is just so stressful for me. He climbs on the table if I have him with me in the kitchen. He won't leave anything alone, its like he can't leave things alone. He runs round crashing into me while I'm doing stuff, he thinks that's the best game ever and whilst he quite likes the garden, his main aim when out there is to escape over the fence (its a high fence, he is just a good climber and we can't change the fence) so I have to sit outside and watch him the whole time.
His speech and understanding are very good for his age so its not even like there's the excuse of not being able to verbalise because he can! He's just started nursery 2 days a week and so far they have no concerns at all which is a bit to me given the nightmare we had with toddler groups but then maybe I am just a shit parent...
I just feel like I am firefighting from the minute he gets up (wailing pitifully and grizzling from the instant he opens his eyes every morning) to bedtime. And then I have to try and find some energy to devote to my 10yr old, and tbh she is getting ignored a lot because I just don't have anything left at the end of the day.
So... what the fuck DOES work? How does one deal with violence from a toddler? How do you help a toddler with such a low boredom threshold?
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Very hard work 3yr old, at the end of my tether... (long sorry)
23 replies
tizzwozz · 30/09/2013 19:45
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