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Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Behaviour/development

Nearly 5 yo suddenly scared of going to toilet alone

12 replies

Honeymoonmummy · 21/09/2013 18:34

Hi all,

My 5yo DD has been fine going to the toilet on her own, but suddenly wants me to go with her. She is especially bad when the window is open, I think she thinks cats are going to get in (scared of cats, long story!). I have reassured her that nothing is in the bathroom, I was in there 5 mins ago etc etc but nothing doing.

Two questions really - one, is this a developmental thing at her age? She has just started school. Two - how would you handle it? My gut feeling is to pander to it and go with her until the phase passes but am open to other suggestions?

TIA

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Honeymoonmummy · 21/09/2013 18:34

Bathroom is upstairs BTW.

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Honeymoonmummy · 21/09/2013 18:36

Oh and she's nearly 5, not 5

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ICameOnTheJitney · 21/09/2013 19:11

Mine is the same and it's maddening isn't it! My DD "caught" this fear from her older sister (aged 9) who had been terrified by a girl at school telling her all kinds of awful ghost stories... I just humour them...sometimes I can make them laugh and they'll go with the door open and me talking to them from another room.

So like you I mostly pander...they won't be insisting on company for long.

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Honeymoonmummy · 23/09/2013 02:50

Thanks Jitney, I do wonder if someone has said something at school. It's good to know I'm not alone

[am posting at strange hour as just had to accompany her to toilet!! ]

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Judyandherdreamofhorses · 23/09/2013 04:43

My 4 year old is suddenly scared of lots of things. She wouldn't go into her own room yesterday unless her (14 mo!) brother went in to protect her, because our cat was in there (cat coughed the other day so is now the devil incarnate, apparently).

She is frightened of something in most of her books (not scary ones!), won't watch tv (damn, there goes my pre-tea babysitter) and spends half her time with her hands over her ears.

I'm very much hoping this is a phase...

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turnipsoup · 23/09/2013 04:59

my 3 year old has suddenly developed a phobia of the noise the cistern makes when it is refilling, and I remember my DS1 going through something similar. I often say to DS2 "you go on in I'll be right there" so he goes in to the toilet by himself, but I always follow him in 30 seconds later.

I'm hoping he will see it is ok eventually.

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turnipsoup · 23/09/2013 05:02

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turnipsoup · 23/09/2013 05:02

sorry for double posting!

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foxy6 · 23/09/2013 05:19

my son used to get up in the night and take himself in the dark to the toilet downstairs until he was about 4 then he got scared of the dark and woke us up every time to go with him . is older brother taught him to be scared of the dark. i would just go with her for now and hopeful after a while what ever it is she is scared of she will get to see that its safe and go by herself. my son is 6 now and will go by himself we just leave the bathroom and hall light on for him.

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Honeymoonmummy · 24/09/2013 09:13

Thanks all, fingers crossed it won't last long!

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neveradullmoment99 · 03/08/2017 18:06

I have been living with this now for months. I know its a zombie post but my dd has been scared of going to the toilet. Think her older brother has been telling her made up scary stories and now she just wont go. We have shown her the toilet, inside the cistern to dispell fears but its now just going on and on and nothing seems to help. Any advice?