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Behaviour/development

8 yr old DS pooing his pants.

15 replies

YoungJoseph · 17/06/2013 20:02

Been going on a year or so now. DS regularly poos his pants, most days in fact unless I tell him to go to the toilet. We went to the Dr and she has suggested Movicol to make him go more often, even though he has never been constipated and a reward chart, rewarding only when he goes without a prompt from me. She was surprised that he has never had constipation or (as far as I know) had a bad experience with the toilet. She felt his tummy and looked for a fissure, no problems there.

DS doesn't seem bothered about this at all, not with me getting cross and the reward chart isn't really inspiring him either. He loves access to our computer but even time on the computer doesn't seem to be enough of a motivator to not poo his pants.

Looking for inspiration really. Dr also suggested a leaflet called 'Sneaky Poo', I've had a quick look and not that impressed with it, not sure it will work. I don't know how to make him bothered by this so that he wants to change!! He seems happy with the status quo.

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Twinklestarstwinklestars · 17/06/2013 20:54

My 8 year old does this too, he did it 3 times yesterday. I wouldn't be so bothered if he got changed but he waits until we smell it (sorry tmi) and tell him to get showered. He would sit in it for hours if we didn't tell him to go for a shower.

I've been to the doctors and they've given him lactulose but he's still doing it even when he can get to the toilet.

He doesn't seem to do it much at school but on a night after school its nearly every day.

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YoungJoseph · 17/06/2013 21:08

Glad I'm not the only one, let's hope that someone who's been through this has some bright ideas.

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Bluestocking · 17/06/2013 21:10

My DS was doing this at eight. He turned nine a couple of months ago and it's almost stopped. It used to make me furious but I honestly think he just didn't notice the signals his body was sending him because he was too busy with other things. He also didn't like using the loo at school for anything other than a quick pee which didn't help.

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Bluestocking · 17/06/2013 21:13

I did ask the GP about it; she rolled her eyes and said that so many boys do it "until they grow out of it" that she would not regard it as a serious problem, once she'd eliminated dietary and other real causes.

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YoungJoseph · 17/06/2013 21:21

Exactly Bluestocking, it started when we bought him a Playstation for his room (now sold in order to buy a Wii for the lounge). Also DH got cross having to wipe his btm. It's since become a habit. He will go after tea BUT only if prompted by me.
I worry that he's lost the ability to recognise the signal.
Like I said if he were bothered by it then he might be more motivated or I would be more inclined to believe there was something physical wrong with him.

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Bluestocking · 17/06/2013 21:31

Hi YJ, I did say to DS that he probably didn't want to be known as "that kid who smells of poo". I'm not sure that sank in at eight but he's become much more aware of himself and the impression he makes on others in the last six months or so, and I think he now doesn't want to run the risk of being whiffy.

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YoungJoseph · 17/06/2013 21:46

Yes, could do with a friend at school not wanting to play because he smells, perhaps he'd be upset then. Successfully holds it in at school, also his friends are too polite.
Have told him no sleepovers until this is sorted.
Thanks for your reassurance though, it's much appreciated.

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Bluestocking · 17/06/2013 21:48

Stay strong! It is amazingly annoying ... but it will sort itself out.

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EugenesAxe · 17/06/2013 22:02

I always read threads like this feeling totally amazed that stuff like this happens. Have you asked him why? I wouldn't have a massive go or anything but I would ask, probably in a voice of mild disbelief, why on earth he thinks it's OK to soil himself like this? Doesn't he care what people will think of him?

I mean maybe there is a raft of boys out there that think pooing your pants is kind of casual, but there must be some that would label someone doing it stupid, or freakish, or both. I'm not really helping... but do you ever think this and worry about it OP? Does he know it if so?

I hope it all works out.

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steppemum · 17/06/2013 22:03

my ds has always been rubbish about pooing, (and horrendously smelly farts)

He wasn't actually pooing his pants at 8, (not quite) but he always left it too late, skid marks etc

He is now 10 and wouldn't do ANYTHING that would embarrass himself, and is very body aware and makes the effort on the toilet front.

This too will pass!

(actually, he was always pretty regular and not constipated, but after much reading on here, I have realised in hindsight that constipation and compaction was an issue. Poo gets very hard, small hard lumps are passed - so pooh in pants - and they suddenly have to go. That was ds)

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VoldemortsNipple · 17/06/2013 22:18

I soiled myself until I was 11. It didn't matter what anybody said or did, it didn't make a difference. I had been told by professionals I was lazy so I believed it. My parents also believed the professionals and hoped I would hurry up and grow out of it.

I actually had overflowing constipation. I was never constipated in the normal way because this kind of constipation is different. Some days I would have normal urges to go the toilet and I always would. Other times as soon as I felt the urge, I couldn't hold on and would soil myself.

I don't believe any child would suddenly choose to soil themselves because they are lazy or because their busy doing something else. Please take your ds back to the doctors and rule out overflowing constipation.

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steppemum · 17/06/2013 22:20

wow voldemort, that sounds a lot like my ds.

What was the solution?

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VoldemortsNipple · 17/06/2013 22:27

From what I remember, I must have had colonic irrigation to clear out my bowels. But that's probably because I had suffered for around 6-7 years.
Apart from that, I was put on senna medicine for around 3 months and my mum made changes to increase fibre in my diet.

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YoungJoseph · 18/06/2013 12:48

Yes, I've asked him about it but I've not received much more than a shrug as an answer.
He's never had constipation, I know because I used to suffer from it regularly until I altered my diet. So it's something I've always kept an eye on.

My problem is, I feel, that I can't help him unless he wants more help. I can send him to the loo after each meal, for example, but if he were more worried about this he could do take himself without a prompt. There's a lot of denial that he needs a poo. Even persuading him to go after tea is an effort.

We have sort medical help and are giving him the Movicol and rewarding unprompted poos. I posted on here to get see if anyone had been where I am now and what happened next.

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YoungJoseph · 18/06/2013 12:50

Oh and the Dr felt his tummy and looked at his bum for signs of a fissure.

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