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Behaviour/development

How does your 4yr old help round the house?

31 replies

thegraduand · 26/02/2013 14:42

I'm getting frustrated that DD (just turned 4) relies on me to do everything, even things I know she can do like getting shoes on. However talking to her about it this morning, it seems she gets frustrated that I don't let her do things to help that she wants to do. At nursery she is "special helper" on certain days and gets to help serve food and clear away. I want to try and develop a list of chores that she can "own" and maybe linked to small rewards if she keeps doing them. My list so far is:

  • put clothes in the washing basket
  • dress self
  • plate in the dishwasher after meals
  • get cutlery out for everyone for dinner.

    Can anyone thing of one or two others?
OP posts:
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FreakoidOrganisoid · 26/02/2013 14:52

Since they were 3 and 4 mine have
Cleared the table
Wiped the table
Swept under and around table after meals
Loaded washing machine (I sort it first)
Put powder and softener in machine and turned it on
Taken their own piles of clothes (already folded) upstairs and put in drawers
Put plug in bath and turned taps on
Tidied their own toys
Put the recycling out
Dusted

They try to hoover but its a bit powerful and awkward for them.

I'm mean aren't I Blush

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sannaville · 26/02/2013 17:42

Dd2 who's 3.6 hangs underwear and socks that have been washed on one of those Peggy things for me, she sets the table for me and sorts the clean washing into piles and takes to relevant bedroom.

Dd1 is almost 9 and strips and changes her bed and hoovers her room and landinf

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MonsterBookOfTysons · 26/02/2013 17:47

Ds is four.
He polishes, sweeps and puts clothes in the wash basket.
Also he is my 'runner' when the lounge/bedroom is a mess I tell him where to put things and he runs them to their places.
It means we tidy together.
Dd is 2.5.
She takes things to the bin when asked and wipes the doors/door frames down with a damp cloth.

I always have to go behind them and do the jobs again when they are asleep but they seem to enjoy it :o

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100DaysofSummer · 26/02/2013 18:48

Ds is 4 and he dresses himself, puts his own coat and shoes in.

He also

Puts plate and cup in sink
Dries table after it's been wiped
Tidies his toys away (half the time)
Changes the bathroom binbag
Hang out wet socks

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100DaysofSummer · 26/02/2013 18:49

Oh and ds is a runner too

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BreadForMyBREADGUN · 26/02/2013 18:53

Sorting out own uniform/clothes for the day
Clothes in laundry basket
Keeps room tidy (fairly successfully too!)
Wipes table
Sometimes helps with preparing dinner. Has often made his packed lunch all by himself.
Helping me put shopping away
Clean laundry back in drawers
Helps hang things on a rack to dry


He's been getting himself dressed, shoes and coat on since he was 3. Had to, we had a very early start.

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BreadForMyBREADGUN · 26/02/2013 18:54

Hmm some of those might have been closer to 5, thinking about it

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thegraduand · 01/03/2013 21:07

OK, your 4 year olds do a lot more than mine. I think it's time for a talk about helping round the house

OP posts:
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DeWe · 01/03/2013 21:19

Mine always found it fun to help me with jobs.
Things like:
put the clothes into the washing basket
Make beds
Strip beds (for sheet washing)
Collect all towels round house (for washing)
Clean the small oven (while I cleaned the big one)
Help make dinner/bake

The sort of thing where I'm doing some and they're doing some. it's a lovely time to chat. Now they'll do some things by themselves. My 5yo can set a wash going on his own, or strip the beds for washing day, clean the kitchen floor, bake small cakes with help with the oven.

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openerofjars · 01/03/2013 21:30

DS is 4.4 and he:
Puts his own and baby DD's clothes in the wash basket
Entertains his baby sister Grin
Takes his plate to the kitchen
Tidies up his toys under protest
Wipes the basin after he has brushed his teeth
Dresses himself
Fetches things (runner)
Switches the television on/off
Gets himself a drink
Puts cutlery out for meals
Takes rubbish to the kitchen bin and indoor recyc bins

He is no good at nipping out to the offie, though, bless him.

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RobotHamster · 01/03/2013 21:58

Bear in mind that the only people who will have replied to this thread are people who have 4yos that do lots.

I'm surprised we've not had the posters who say 'they are only a baby once, you're their MOTHER. Why can't you do everything for them'

Wink

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Acinonyx · 01/03/2013 22:25

Well my 7 yr-old does very little of this stuff and at 4 - absolutely none. Somehow I doubt that I am alone....

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HeffaFlump · 01/03/2013 22:30

Any Tips Grin
It took me two hours to get my 4yo Ds to pick up his crayons Envy

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IllGetOverIt · 01/03/2013 22:36

Agree with Robot Wink

My answer is..... Erm nothing. You're their mother !

Though our dc enjoys helping me do things and having a natter as we go. If its a 'chore' they won't be as interested.

Independence - yes
At the sacrifice of their tiny amount of time as a dc- no

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tigerdriverII · 01/03/2013 22:38

Er. They are 4. They don't do around the house. They may not do it at 14, 24, 34, etc

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thegraduand · 01/03/2013 22:39

Phew, I can never decide if I spoil DD because she is an only child, then at the same time I feel like I'm always being bossy and nagging

OP posts:
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notcitrus · 01/03/2013 22:41

My 4yo is meant to put coat, hat, shoes tidily away when he comes in, and almost always does.
Getting dressed - can do, usually does. Except when has a stop instead.

Brings used dishes to kitchen, put on side - when reminded.

Not much else, but he is very good at passing things when I have the baby, and in particular keeping baby happy while I get stuff done. Which is very useful and a good foundation for the future.

He's small and can only just reach say kitchen counter, so that restricts what he can do. He's only recently managed buttons and bottom-wiping, which were priority.

Once we have a new warm kitchen I can let him in, ill work on laying cutlery and returning cups etc to the kitchen.

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blacktaildog · 01/03/2013 22:42

oh good ideas

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HorryIsUpduffed · 01/03/2013 22:44

Mine is 4.8.

He is expected to clear the table of his own things after meals, put his dirty clothes in the washing basket, and put his shoes away.

We tidy up together as he needs micromanaging - eg I ask him to put the plastic blocks in their drawer while I put the dinosaurs away.

He gets himself dressed but likes me to put his clothes out probably 6 days a week.

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RobotHamster · 01/03/2013 22:49

"Agree with Robot

My answer is..... Erm nothing. You're their mother !"

You don't agree with me at all. I think it's a great thing to teach children that there isn't a magic cleaning fairy that picks up after them, and they need to learn it from an early age. I will not have DS grow up to be one of those men who think that laundry and housework magically does itself.

DS has been tidying up his own toys since he was old enough to pick them up. I expect him to put his own clothes in the laundry and take his own plate out to the kitchen. If you start young then you don't have to have a big argument when they're older and have got used to doing bugger all.

He doesn't do hoovering yet, but as soon as hes tall enough....

Grin

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RobotHamster · 01/03/2013 22:50

"Er. They are 4. They don't do around the house. They may not do it at 14, 24, 34, etc"

Are you actually mad?

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openerofjars · 01/03/2013 22:54

Ooh, I forgot one: he wakes us up in the mornings, making sure to get up especially early at weekends. It's a skill.

I'm pretty much just here to put the hair back on playmobil people.

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HorryIsUpduffed · 01/03/2013 22:55

Robot I definitely agree with that. Four is too young to do "household jobs" but old enough to take care of one's own belongings.

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RobotHamster · 01/03/2013 22:56

openerofjars - oh lord. the playmobil hair

That is one thing DS is terrible at. He'll pick up all the lego, all the scooby doo stuff will be in its box, dressing up stuff away. Playmobil stuff is ignored and tbh I don't blame him. I think I need to box it up and put it away from everybody to preserve sanity.

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RobotHamster · 01/03/2013 22:58

Horry- yes, he doesn't take care of house things yet at all, he's too little for that. He will wipe his little table and sort out his own things.

Sometimes Imake him help me with the laundry. Its for his own good Wink

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