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Behaviour/development

How to I react to sons behaviour?

8 replies

Ange1972 · 06/02/2013 11:10

Hi.... I've only ever posted on here once so bear with me...

I'm a single parent to a 10 year old son. I have no family support and sons dad lives 50 miles away. My sons attitude and behaviour us really starting to get me down. I love him so much and know he can be a very nice child, he is my world. At the minute everything is a battle. I get called an idiot, I get snapped at, attitude is just unbearable. I try my best to discipline and punish bad behaviour but nothing seems to improve it? I've tried time out, confiscating things, shouting, ignoring, threats of telling his dad/teacher etc (he is the epitome of good behaviour for his dad!). Nothing is working???

Help???

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JiltedJohnsJulie · 06/02/2013 12:44

Haven't got much advice, just wanted to offer my sympathy. Our DS is almost 9 and we are experiencing something similar. It's tough isn't it.

Hopefully someone will be along soon

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cupboardlove · 06/02/2013 13:45

I can understand how tough it is too. My 8 yeard old DS has ADHD and Aspergers syndrome and can be a massive handful. The only things that I have found that work are being consistent with discipline, choose your battles (I very often have to take a moment to think "does this really matter?") and praise and rewards always work well. (I try to use free rewards like going to the park or playing his favourite game). Having said all this we still have good days and more difficult days - today at the dentist was a more difficult one :-)

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steppemum · 06/02/2013 14:05

Much sympathy Ange, I have a stroppy 10 year old and it can be exhausting even with 2 parents.

There have been some great threads in the past with lots of suggestions on. At the least it is encouraging to see others are struggling too. Can I suggest you do a search and see what you find? I used to post at length on all those threads, but I just can't do that anymore, so do go and see what has been said before. Lots of good stuff.

and have a you need it

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Ange1972 · 06/02/2013 20:29

Thanks all for your comments...... It's so hard to know whether what we're doing is 'right'?!

I find it hard to be consistent.... I am... But I find it a struggle.... I think maybe my son picks up on this? I work is a demanding job which is stressful (tho I love my job!) and sometimes I don't have any fight left in me!! Xx

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JiltedJohnsJulie · 06/02/2013 20:38

Is your DS unpredictable too? Sometimes my DS is so sweet and at others he can be a real brat sometimes. It's so hard!

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Ange1972 · 06/02/2013 21:20

Hiya JiltedJohnJulie... Sometimes he is unpredictable yes. Xx

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Tubegirl · 06/02/2013 21:47

This might sound a bit daft but maybe a super nanny type agreement where you sit down with him and agree rules and consequences and stick to it? Try to get dad on side (I appreciate this may not be possible - I have problems trying to agree courses of action with my ex). That way your son is consulted and encouraged to think about and take responsibility for his behaviour. I hope you find a way through it.

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Ange1972 · 07/02/2013 07:55

Thank you tubegirl I was thinking of giving that a go! He's away for 4 days as of tomorrow at his dads I will try and think up something.... Thank you xxx