clinginess at 5 months?

[melanies]

my baby has taken to screaming sometimes when being held by someone other than mum or dad or even just when someone speaks to her. Had no problems up until about 4 months old and just turned 5 months this week. Particular concern is her screaming whenever my mum holds her (my mum is supposed to be helping with childcare when I return to work!). Anyone with simialar experiences? What did you do to resolve?

[blueshoes]

My dd's separation anxiety started at 5 months as well. But she was always a cuddly baby and still is a cuddly toddler - so I think it was hardwired into her temperament. I can't offer any advice on how to resolve it because I postponed the start of my work until she was 1 year. I left her with my mother who came to live with me so my dd had lots of time to get used to my mother as a caregiver. A month before I started, I left her with mum for increasing periods of time during the day. Dd was fine by the time I returned, although I worried a lot that she would not cope.

Dd is now 2.5 and has been attending fulltime nursery since 18 months. She is still a clingy toddler at home but has adjusted nicely to nursery - where she is a lot more independent.

Hope someone else can come along and advise on a baby your dd's age.

[grannygoose]

Hi Melanies - I have noticed in the last week or two that my Ds (6 months) suddenly bursts into tears for no reason when being held by someone else. This is a new feature as he never used to mind going to anyone else. One of my friends reports that her Dd has suddenly started the same thing with her mum. Seems that it might be a stage then? I dont have a solution, but thought I would post just to say that it seems to be quite common - good luck with your baba

[CKMUM]

my first was 4 months when she started screaming when anyone other than me or her dad held her. It carried on until she was about 20 months, when she would be held by people she knew well and it wasn't until she was 23 months.

My midwife said its normal at about 8 months for a few months so maybe she started this phase too early but said she would be concerned if she wasn't like this. Although it made it difficlut for us to leave her, I was told it was a good thing, it wasn't being clingy and showed she had bonded with us.

I was very offended when she started going to others, even though it made life easier.

DD2 seemed to be fine being held by others, although i made a point of being round lots of people to get her used to them, but i was concerned that she didnt love me as she went to others so readily but at 8 or 9 months she started only coming to me and she still cries for others now at 14 months

[LIZS]

dd's started then too , peaked at around 18 months and has gradually become less. She became more tolerant of being held and left with family by practice, but took ages to adjust to childcare(had abortive attempts before 2) but became happier from 2 (when she started a v small playgroup). Even at 4 1/2 she likes to have someone stay with her at parties and will only be left in certain circumstances, although will settle down if the person is prepared ot let her cry for a bit.

[melanies]

Just wanted to say thanks for all the advice. We had been trying to take it slow with my mum and yesterday had a major breakthrough when we went swimming and dd was happy to be held by gran the whole time!! She also then went on to take a bottle from her too!

She still has problems with some people as she has since screamed at my brother in law, but hopefully if we just keep trying to introduce her to people gradually, she will be OK! :)

[GarfieldsGirl]

Hi melanies, my ds is 5 1/2 months, and has just started screaming when I leave the room, adn doesn't settle down at all until i'm back in sight. She will get used to it when you're not there, probably just at the point when you don't want to let go!!