DS (5) is in reception. He has always had poor social skills for his age - e.g poor eye contact and sometimes difficulty playing directly with other children. He has never dressed up. However, on the positive side, he will try and join in (e.g. run and join a group of boys playing on the climbing frame) and can seem to do OK as 'one of the lads' rather than chatting in a one-to-one context. He generally has poor eye contact and often doesn't greet others. Some of this is shyness but often it seems that he doesn't understand social chat. For example, I invited one of his classmates for a playdate. The classmate ran over to say "I'm going to your house today'. DS did not respond. When I questioned him he say 'I know that already' - so he didn't see a need to speak.
Academically he is fine. His reading is coming on. He recognises his numbers to 20 and can do simple sums. His writing is weak but progressing. Nursery were a bit concerned about him, though his current reception teacher is fab and not concerned. He loves her so is willing to do as asked.
He went to the school nursery and seemed to be doing OK socially. However, in reception I've noted that he's getting invited less to parties - including by boys who I would have considered his best mates. Playdates are generally because of my initiation and not always reciprocated. The other mums always say he's behaved well, but I'm not sure if they're being honest. I'm tempted to ask one of the mums if all is OK, but am holding back as it seems like a recipe for social death.
I suppose my questions are two-fold.
- Does this sound like a wider developmental concern? Noone has ever mentioned ASD. I realise that he has some symptoms but not others - e.g. he does do some imaginative play (not dressing up but playing with little figures) and is very cuddly.
- What can I do to help his social skills? I am working on eye contact, greeting people and being a little pushy in arranging playdates.