Afraid of the dark

[poppiesinaline]

DS1 (9) wont go to sleep unless the light is on etc etc. DD (6) isnt bothered about the dark and as far as I can remember DS1 wasnt at her age. Is it an age thing?

[PinkTulips]

i've been afraid of the dark my whole life so it's definitely not an age thing!

[ruty]

me too! Don't know why really.

[poppiesinaline]

well you lot are a fat lot of good! LOL Do you all sleep with the light on

Anyone else shed any light ?

[poppiesinaline]

LOL no pun intended!!!! Anyone else help with this matter?

[ruty]

i know its ridiculous. i grew up in a creaky old vicarage and my mum always used to make me go to bed early and i felt miles away from anyone else. That's my excuse anyway! i heard its best for babies to sleep in the dark so i've trained myself to do it recently. For me it was the stress associated with bedtime i think that made it worse. Maybe its because your Ds1 is now getting to hear about scary things [at school, from friends, etc] and that is preying on her imagination. it may just pass though.

[BagelBird]

We recently rented a house in the middle of nowhere - tiny village with no street lighting. Big old stone cottage with the creaky floors and funny scraping noise from massive attic (birds - I hope). A power cut in the middle of the night with DH away left me terrified. I was watching tv alone in a big room downstairs and suddenly was plunged into darkness. I had no candles, no idea about fuses to check fuse box - couldn’t see the box it was so dark). So I cautiously padded my way upstairs and jumped in bed with my then 3 yr old! What a wimp! DH came home in the early hours of the morning to find lights on everywhere and tv blaring ! It is not a logical fear and can’t be rationalised which makes me more stressed knowing I am being ridiculous for worrying!

If there is no particular trigger (such as a scene in a movie that has upset him, or a story) then I would go easy on him, maybe fit a dimmer switch, or a touch light next to his bed, and try to dim it gradually over a few weeks to the point where he is ok with the door open and a light on in the hallway instead. Bedtime should be relaxing and stressfree and he is only 9. Just check that it isn’t deflected worries and that there isn’t something else playing on his mind.

[ruty]

sorry i meant his imagination!

[poppiesinaline]

Bagelbird - I think I would have totally freaked out plunged into darkness like you were too!!

May try the dimmer lights etc for him. Good tips. Thanks.

[PinkTulips]

lol, i'm even worse, when my dp worked the night shift i slept with the lavalamp on and a knife next to the bed and we live in brightly lit apartments in a city! even if dp is there i have to have a light in the room that i can switch of while sitting in bed (theres monsters underneath!)

no idea why i'm like this as parents used always think it was ridiculous too and didn't make many concessions to it. i tried desperately not to pass it on to dd (14 months) and to make her sleep in a dark room, but she does have a night light now as when she wakes up in a completely dark room she screams as if she's being murdered, which in turn freaks me out. think it may be genetic!

it does provide no end of amusement to dp though so some good comes out of it!

[pebblemum]

I am another one who hates the dark. If i am in total darkness I panic, it feels as though i am trapped/suffocating. Ive always felt silly about it and no one knows how bad my fear is, well until now that is . My ds1 likes to have the hall light on just in case he has to go to the toilet during the night but he sleeps with his door shut so his fear isnt as bad as mine. If dh is at home then i too can shut the bedroom door but if he is away or at work then i have to leave the door open, just enough to let some light in.

[hulababy]

I don't like sleeping int he dark either. Been even worse since we were burgled (whilst out) about 8 years ago. I have to have the landing light on and the door very slightly ajar. As a result I have always left DD's door slightly open too.