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Behaviour/development

Wingeing & whining..on & on & on & On...

10 replies

mojomummy · 18/02/2006 17:24

DD is 2 yrs 8mths & unfortunately seems to whine all the time. At the moment she is doing because she wants to watch Dora. We've just spend a good hour at the park, walking, playing on the swings. So don't think it's boredom or maybe it's tiredness. However, it's becoming more of habit & it's just awful.

Any ideas for nipping it in the bud ?

(she is a bright chatty lovely little girl, but we've got to stop this ! I do say, there's no need to whine for it, you can ask nicely)

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Twiglett · 18/02/2006 17:34

wait till she's 5

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Sparklemagic · 18/02/2006 17:34

Have you tried big-time distraction? For instance with the watching Dora thing, I assume you've said no otherwise she wouldn't be wingeing! So once you've said no, offer her two choices of other activities "No, we can't watch TV but we can do some playdough or some jigsaws - would you like playdough or jigsaws?" (said in extremely animated voice!)

If she persists, refuses to be distracted, I would tell her you don't speak to people who whine, and when she can talk properly you will talk to her. And then ignore her till she stops!

This is all I can think of, it has worked for people I know but every child is different! HTH.

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Elibean · 18/02/2006 19:36

I tell dd (2.1) I don't understand, and to talk to Mummy in her big girl voice. She knows exactly what that means, and it works well - she stops immediately; but have to admit, often only for that one request/statement. Then, if she's tired or bored, we start all over again!

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mojomummy · 18/02/2006 19:49

Sparklemagic - I didn't & don't even get chance to say NO !

Requests come out as

Everything, it seems, has a life or death urgency - it's not like she's ignored at all.

I will definetely try the big girl voice though

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Redtartanlass · 18/02/2006 21:01

I say something simliar as Elibean and Sprkelmagic,to my 2yr old. I say "Speak, properly I can't understand you, when you whine"

It doesn't change what he's asking for, but for some reason, he tends to listen to my answer if he asks again 'nicley', and is more open to suggestions. "No you can't have cake, but how about some grapes"

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WideWebWitch · 18/02/2006 21:03

I say 'don't say whine whine mummy, say please may I have xyx' and she complies! She's 2 and 3mos. Or when ds used to do this and was older 'please use a normal voice' and I'd refuse to answer until he did.

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mojomummy · 19/02/2006 10:55

thanks ladies. DD does ask nicely for things - it's just the voice/tone.

We've had a 'chat' this am. I've called the whiney voice the Swiper Voice, so when she does it I say, sorry, can't understand, is swiper ?
Has managed to stop her in her tracks & I can see her little mind ticking over. Fingers crossed this will work.

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Blandmum · 19/02/2006 10:58

I always say, 'I can't hear you when you use the whingy voice'

Be presistant, and it does work in the end

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Kathy1972 · 20/02/2006 12:28

Libby Purves writes about pretending you have magic 'whine filters' in your ears which mean you can't hear whining. Would seem to lighten the tone a bit!