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Behaviour/development

When should we start wearing pyjamas?

26 replies

Annie29 · 13/02/2006 15:57

By 'we' I mean the parents! What age is it acceptable for a child to still see his parents in the nude (usually just getting out of the shower, or going to bed, nothing naughty I promise). My DS is ten months old, and I'm sure it doesn't bother him, but when should it stop? We haven't worn pj's in about ten years, so it would be weird for us, but I'm worried it could be disturbing for a little one, imagine that being his earliest memory...

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harpsichordcarrier · 13/02/2006 15:58

what would be disturbing about it Annie29?

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motherinferior · 13/02/2006 15:59

Why on earth shouldn't he see you naked?

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sandyballs · 13/02/2006 15:59

Never! Best to be open and relaxed about these things I think. My DDs are nearly 5 and have always seen me wander out the bathroom nude, getting dressed, on the loo etc and take it in their stride. DH on the other hand is quite modest and covers up but this seems to create more interest - they love to try and rip his towel off and have a laugh!

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motherinferior · 13/02/2006 16:00

Yes, my two snigger at their father's prudishness

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cod · 13/02/2006 16:01

Message withdrawn

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Annie29 · 13/02/2006 16:04

I just wouldn't fancy seeing my parents with no clothes on!!! I know it's different as I'm all grown up (or so I'm told). Imagine being fourteen or so and going to school with a picture of your dad's dangleys in your head...
Anyway, Cod, thanks...

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skerriesmum · 13/02/2006 16:06

Sometimes I wonder about this too. Ds is 3 and loves nothing more than to "play naked", and gets so excited when he walks in on either of us changing or whatever. I guess they eventually lose interest don't they?

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noddyholder · 13/02/2006 16:08

Never!It is ok for your kids to see you ds still comes in for a chat when I am in the bath and he is 11 He would die btw if he caught as much as a glimpse of anyone elses boobs but I am just part of the furniture and he doesn't bat an eyelid!

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Annie29 · 13/02/2006 16:08

I guess they don't have any inhibitions til they reach puberty. Quite right too, I suppose.

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Annie29 · 13/02/2006 16:12

I love us all being in the bath together actually. I don't want it to end

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childern · 13/02/2006 17:17

my two are 3.5yrs and nearly 2yrs and they don't seem to mind just normal in fact our oldest one keeps saying he wants togo to bed with nothing on like mummy and daddy. I think if you make it a big issue then they think its strange. It might be because when we where growning up with 7 in a house trying to get to the loo without someone being in the bathroom was hard.

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lou33 · 13/02/2006 17:29

I've only just started insisting on privacy for myself from my kids, and my oldest is nearly 14!

They don't think twice about seeing me undressed, but i thought it was time to cover up in front of dd1, so in order not to make her feel like the odd one out, i have applied the privacy rule to all of the, (youngest is 5 in a few days)

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PandaG · 13/02/2006 17:32

We have only one loo in the bathroom, so when all trying to get out in the morning it is quite common for me to be in shower, dh on loo and dd 3.11 and ds 6.2 cleaning teeth. Think this is fine, but would be more modest if they started to get embarrassed. I was brought up in a house where sharing the bathroom was the norm, in fact if I stay at my parents I still might have a natter to my mum while she is in the bath. Dh was brought up in a much more modest family - don't ever see PIL's in dressing gown even 1st thing in the morning always fully dressed, but if DH was inhibited now he would never get to work on time! Think whatever works for your family is fine in the nudity thing. We keep asking ourselves at what point DS stops sharing a bath with DD of a good friend of ours when they have a sleepover - think the time is very soon.

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Piffle · 13/02/2006 17:35

My ds is 12 and I still sleep in the buff (except onchilly nights)
I warn him, if he doesn't leave he will see more of his mother than he needs to ever see adn he shifts it sharpish

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HellKat · 13/02/2006 17:44

Pmsl Piffle!

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bobbybobbobbingalong · 13/02/2006 18:26

Maybe until they don't want to be seen naked themselves. Which should give you a few years.

Ds (almost 3) and I still share a family changing room at the pool with my mum and dad. Seems more normal to me than changing in a room full of women I don't even know.

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mszebra · 13/02/2006 18:44

i was reading a parenting book which suggested age 8yrs is about when most children get shy about their bodies, I think it';s a respect thing at that point... already I am a bit shy around my 6yo (I can tell he is "looking"). Depends on you, as well as the kid.

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Filyjonk · 13/02/2006 19:11

My 7 mo gets all excited when she sees me naked. You can see her thinking-FOOD!

Ds is 2 and I've never thought about it tbh. But then my mum still on occasion walk around naked (in front of me and the kids not dh)...she really is part of the furniture in that way I'm afraid (not in any other way though, much larger than life).

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magnolia1 · 13/02/2006 22:43

We don't wear clothes to bed and often get up in the morning when the girls are in our room. They don't care although dh is very strategic when putting boxers on

I have stayed at my mums on the odd night and my dad still walks around naked in the night, doesn'y bother me and he is usually sleep walking so can't get embarrassed

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nooka · 13/02/2006 23:05

Until they object, I think. I don't think I have ever seen my father naked (think he would be hugely embarrassed!) but my mother has no such inhibitions, and expects to come and talk to us in the bath and vice versa (her daughters - don't think she would be so relaxed with my brother). My two think being naked is on the whole just funny - when they notice, that is - but at almost seven my ds has started to be a bit shy himself. I have to admit I told him that he shouldn't be so silly (think it is very peer originated, as we have never referred to his "privates"), and on the whole he is happy to run about wildly after his swimming class in the large common changing room in the buff, so I think he has a way to go yet!

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ShaysMummy · 13/02/2006 23:10

my 2 bros and i always saw my mum naked, right up till i left home.
we only ever saw my dad by accident.
she didnt parade around or anything, she just didnt hide herself.

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Callmemadam · 13/02/2006 23:42

from our experience I would say when they start asking you to. DD was about 10 when this happened. By then ds1 was 13 and our bodies weren't that beautiful anymore anyway! More importantly, when your children a older you may have quite a few sleepovers, and it is NEVER acceptable to be anything other than well covered when other children may need you in the middle of the night! Sounds as though you have a few years to go before you need worry, though!

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swedishmum · 13/02/2006 23:44

Our oldest is 12 and we don't have pyjamas. I always have my bathrobe on my bed and don't wander round naked. They know to knock if our door is shut. Hopefully they'll grow up with less hang-ups than I got from my suppressed parents.

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pashmina · 14/02/2006 16:22

I hate sleeping in pj's!! my dd's don't seem bothered, but my yougest laughs when i'm on the loo and will not leave me alone - really annoying but her laugh is infectious

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thewomanwhothoughtshewasahat · 14/02/2006 16:32

when dd2 (3) wakes up she gets out of bed and toddles into the bathroom, she arranges the bathmat and/or towel just so and then sits cross-legged watching whoever is in the shower, usually in silence. Occassionally she asks you to point the shower head at the shower door as this amuses her greatly. I can't ever imagine telling her that this little ritual of hers is not allowed. I also think that being able to recall seeing a naked man (albeit my father) would have been a good thing when I got a bit older. It would have made it (the male body) something normal not something wierd, mysterious, fascinating and even at bit frightening. Seeing my mum naked would probably have made me both more appreciative of my nice teenage body whilst less concerned overall with teh whole body image thing (if those two things make sense together)

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