fibs in a 3yo - tackle or ignore?

[MascaraOHara]

my dd has an active imagination and will tell the most detailed 'fibs''stories'. These are mostly harmless.

I sometimes don't know whether I should say it's not true or just agree with her. Agreeing is always easier but you can't always agree.

[MascaraOHara]

sorry so the question is how do you deal with fibbing?

[aloha]

I think of them as 'stories' rather than 'fibs' or 'lies'. I think 'Oh, really?' is quite a good response for a lot of things three year olds say.

[MascaraOHara]

'Oh really' is what she normally gets but they range from 'x pushed me over' when I can visibly see that they didn't to 'nana is moving house, she is moving to a village or near my nursery' to which I answered 'oh when did she tell you this' to which she replied 'when I was talking to her on the phone'

I wouldn't call them lies and I always say 'no they didn't' when it's a fib about a child

I don't want to discourage her imagination but sometimes I get frustrated - I worry that she might fib about me to her dad and also the other way round. She has said that granny has hit her before which even though I don't get on with 'granny' i don't believe that she hit her for a minute!

I would however believe her if she said her dad hit her. I've tried explaining you can tell nince stories about people but not nasty one's but she doesn't get it and I don't want to go to far in case she thinks she can't tell me a horrible truth (if that makes sense)

[aloha]

ah, i see, i can understand why you are concerned. i'm sure she has no idea of the possible effects of her stories but likes the sense of drama they give her and possibly the reaction of others. Not sure what to suggest, either trying to explain why it's not nice to say bad things about people, or to give no reaction whatsoever. Tricky.

[MascaraOHara]

I would imagine all 3yo's tell stories/fibs though, maybe even to the same degree - I don't know.

[Orinoco]

Message withdrawn

[MascaraOHara]

That's not a bad line actually I might try that., I have tried "now that's not true is it(?)" in a jokey voice and also whilst laughing "you little fibber" sometimes she laughs, sometimes she argues the toss. A popular one since fireworks night is "Mummy I just saw a firework, did you?" in fact actually the list is endless. Will definitely try the nice story line!