How to persuade DH to go for a name I like?

(18 Posts)
roseinwinter Tue 29-Apr-14 22:12:10

My DH has VERY strong opinions and is annoyingly difficult when he digs his heels in.
The only girls' names he says he likes are Emily and Sophie. Whilst I don't mind those names, our surname is really boring and they are so popular at the moment I want something less common. My suggestions are by no means off the wall (think Flora, Jemima, etc) but he has dismissed them all.
So my question is: how do you persuade a stubborn DH you are right?!!!!!
(Would be useful to know this generally, not just in the context of choosing baby names!)

shakinstevenslovechild Tue 29-Apr-14 22:17:59

I simply reminded my dh that I could register the birth without him there and gave him a list of made up possibilities of the names I could choose on my own, he soon came around grin

Delphiniumsblue Tue 29-Apr-14 22:18:26

You just keep going until you get a compromise. My children would all have had different names if we had had our first choices.

Stars66 Tue 29-Apr-14 22:33:58

When she pops out look at her and say she is looks so much like a [insert name]. He will be so smitten he will agree. Job donesmile

roseinwinter Tue 29-Apr-14 22:36:16

Thanks. I think I'll mention a few names then leave it until she arrives and use Stars' trick! Fingers crossed...

Blueuggboots Tue 29-Apr-14 22:42:02

Tell him!! or make him buy you an enormous diamond as compensation

runningonwillpower Tue 29-Apr-14 22:46:56

So his 'strong opinions' effectively limit you to a short-list of two. Both his choice.

What about your 'strong opinions'?

We had a short-list of two names, although in our case we agreed the names jointly - we just couldn't decide.

Anyway, after watching me give birth my husband said, ' know what, I think you've just earned the casting vote'.

Need I say more?

Tambajam Tue 29-Apr-14 22:53:45

Google the options he wants. Present him with the list of the thousands of others with those exact names who have unsavoury criminal records/ pop careers/ websites. Suggest more originality.

alita7 Tue 29-Apr-14 23:06:36

you've got to agree, neither of you will be happy if you go for the others choice, you'll find it boring, he won't like it. Try that online name picker thing that compares your lists and suggests compromises?

If he's too stubborn then go with the when she's born thing.

RoseberryTopping Wed 30-Apr-14 08:24:09

I'd tell him he's got no bloody choice but to widen his choice of names or you will not be a happy woman! It's seriously unfair if he is leaving you to choose between 2 nice, but very boring names.

It has to be something you are both happy with, not just him. Cry if you have to!

randdom Wed 30-Apr-14 09:53:58

Just keep talking about it. For a boys name my husband had always said he wanted an Alexander and for a lot of the early part if our discussions he wouldn't consider anything else. We read through lists and talked about it and we now have a name we both like. However it is worth noting that you might have to compromise too as it isn't my first choice name either. I still love it though!

(Knowing my luck after all that it will be a girl :p)

Scotinoz Wed 30-Apr-14 10:45:32

You don't! He considers things other than Sophie and Emily (which are lovely by both way) and you reach a compromise. You have to agree on a name you both like.

And once bub pops out you'll pick something completely different anyway.

lentilpot Wed 30-Apr-14 11:07:32

Have you tried this website? www.namedtogether.co.uk/ If you've really reached an impasse then it might help you find some common ground if you both did the top 500!

ps. Would you consider Emilia? I think it's such a pretty name!

squoosh Wed 30-Apr-14 11:36:53

Print off two lists of the top 200 names, available here, and spend an hour separately marking the names you like. Hopefully it will throw up a few names that you both like but hadn't previously thought of.

He can't simply dig his heels in and say it has to be either Sophie or Emily. Both parents need to agree to a name. Anything else is just unfair.

roseinwinter Thu 01-May-14 14:12:52

Some great ideas here. Thanks! You'd think after a few years of marriage we'd have cracked the compromise thing but no...

Blueberrybaby Thu 01-May-14 18:44:07

Have you told him what you have told us? Which is that you want something more striking than Emily or Sophie because of your common surname? Can you ask him to go back to the drawing board and come back with some names that are traditional and pretty like Sophie and Emily, but that are perhaps a bit less popular these days. Try throwing the gauntlet down and setting it as a challenge. E.g. Nothing in the top 30 or 40 but still well known and classic. Perhaps Matilda, Eleanor, Harriet, Anna, Zara, Annabel(le), Francesca, Violet, Lydia, Alexandra, Gabriella. They are all outside of the top 40.

bakingtins Thu 01-May-14 19:47:32

lentil thank you for the suggestion of named together will be doing that this evening!

ShoeWhore Thu 01-May-14 19:50:49

I found asking immediately after delivery while dh was still in shock was remarkably effective grin

No harm in laying a bit of groundwork now though.

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