Opinions please on naming baby after poorly grandmother to be??

(31 Posts)
Thebuttonfancier Thu 14-Nov-13 11:56:14

I put a thread up here earlier in the week about girls names. Since then, we have had the devastating news that my lovely MIL has been diagnosed with secondary cancer. There is some hope but the prognosis is not great. Husband and I both love her name (Beatrice) but discounted it as it's her name. We're now considering using this name but I need opinions on whether this is a nice touch as a way for our little girl to connect with her grandma if/
when the worst happens or whether it might offend or be a constant reminder to other family members etc?

I think it's lovely to use a family name, perhaps as a middle name?

Hi, we're in a similiar situation, DP's mum is Margaret and although we are having some trouble picking a first name, I would like to use this as her middle name

squoosh Thu 14-Nov-13 12:07:03

I doubt very much whether people would be offended, it's a lovely way to honour a much loved elderly relative. The only circumstances that would make me hesitant about using a deceased relative's name would be if it was the name of a child who had died or someone who had died in tragic circumstances.

Bunbaker Thu 14-Nov-13 12:07:39

I think it's a lovely idea as well. I named DD after my favourite aunt because I liked the name anyway and it always reminds of my late aunt. My cousin was very touched that I named DD after her mother.

squoosh Thu 14-Nov-13 12:08:29

Ah, so she may not be elderly as such but still a lovely gesture that I'm sure lots of people will absolutely love esp. MIL herself.

WiseKneeHair Thu 14-Nov-13 12:10:13

I think it's a lovely idea. My DS1 is named after his grandfather (who is still alive) and they both love it as it does give than a special bond.

WiseKneeHair Thu 14-Nov-13 12:11:10

Forgot to say, Beatrice is a beautiful name as well.

Thebuttonfancier Thu 14-Nov-13 12:18:45

She's definitely not elderly and this will be her first grandchild. I suppose I would also worry about offending my own mum but I think she would understand in the circumstances. Life is rubbish sometimes, thank goodness we all have something positive to focus on in the baby. Thanks for your comments x

buttercrumble Thu 14-Nov-13 12:23:41

Lovely idea and beautiful name

Badmumof3 Thu 14-Nov-13 12:37:39

Talk to your mum about it. I'm sure she'd understand. My first daughter has a name that reflects my late Mums name but also has a name of her own too. My mum was called Roberta and we thought it was too old fashioned for a 20th century baby, so we used Robyn as a middle name. Whatever you do, though, you have to like it, as you'll be shouting it enough in the next 18 years or so!

Fifibluebell Thu 14-Nov-13 17:55:47

Its a lovely name, I wouldn't use it after a family member personally purely because I would worry how it made the other grandmother feel I'm sure they would never say they felt left out but I would over think it and feel guilty to the one who's name I didn't use

BikeRunSki Thu 14-Nov-13 18:05:42

It's fairly traditional to name a child after a grandparent, regardless of age or health.

Lastofthepodpeople Thu 14-Nov-13 18:12:19

Our DS was named after my grandfather. He was thrilled and flattered.

KnockMeDown Thu 14-Nov-13 18:23:33

My DD has the middle name Elizabeth after my mum, who is very much alive and well. But in your circumstance, I think it would be a lovely gesture, very much appreciated by your MIL, and will probably raise her spirits greatly. Of course, the fact that it is a beautiful name helps matters greatly. Consider yourselves lucky MIL isn't Hilda or Gertrude grin

sleepingbeautiful Thu 14-Nov-13 18:28:11

Yes, do it - she can be baby Bea to differentiate from MIL, so sweet smile
Does your mum have a nice name or middle name (or her mum) that you can put as a middle name?

Weegiemum Thu 14-Nov-13 18:48:46

We decided to call our dd2 Rachel (after dh's dgm) and Jessie (after my gran).

After we'd made that decision (other stuff for a boy) sadly my husbands grandmother deteriorated (due to age) and died 2 weeks before dd2 was born. So dd2 was calked Rachel.

Angie1978 Thu 14-Nov-13 18:56:06

Dd has Christine as her middle name as its the only link shell ever have to my dm who died when I was very young.

Dmil never blinked a eye as she understood.

Ds has Charles as his middle name after dfil who died 6 months after he was born.

It's a lovely idea and Beatrice is beautiful name.

MrsCharlieD Thu 14-Nov-13 20:07:35

I think it is a lovely idea. i am named after my great grandma x

Inglori0us Fri 15-Nov-13 18:54:05

It's a lovely name and a lovely gesture. I'm sure your mil would be very touched. Talk to her about it.
I gave my dd my sick grandma's name (Violet) as a middle name, and if my next baby is a girl she'll have my other (long deceased) grandma's name, Eleanor.

Chocolateteabag Fri 15-Nov-13 19:01:07

Could you not have your mum's name as a middle name too?

Ihatepeas Fri 15-Nov-13 19:36:06

I think it's a lovely idea and such a sweet name too!

superzero Fri 15-Nov-13 19:41:39

Beatrice is a lovely name.
We have used a grandparent name for one DCs first name and another as a DC middle name and both were flattered.

OnABabyDiet Fri 15-Nov-13 19:52:54

DD1 would have had my mum's name as her MN anyway, however my mum was in hospital when DD1 was born and sadly passed away when DD was 3 months old. My mum was touched and proud to have this new life named after her and I was so glad she got to know her for the short time they were on this earth together.
Go for it: Whatever happens, MIL will be honoured.

kirstyd1 Sat 16-Nov-13 23:15:00

My mum passed away when i was a child, my dd now has her name as her middle name. She loves the fact she is named after 'special' as she calls her x

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