I fed up. I'm veering between an emotional, tearful but not crying slob and full of absolute anger and rage at who knows what.
The house is a tip and is very much reflecting how I feel. Nothing is in its place, stuff is piled up everywhere and the dc are driving me potty in between moments where they are utterly adorable.
My husband is being so loving and trying to understand but that just makes me feel even more of a failure.
I was diagnosed moderate to severe pnd when my dts were 5 months old. It was discussed that i also possibly had pnd after the birth of ds1 as he was quite poorly at 7 weeks. dd1 was a breeze and while i adore all 4 dc, i sometimes wonder what it would have been like if i stopped at her. A bit of juggling about with medication helped but now I feel like I've crashed into an abyss with no way of getting out. I post elsewhere here about other stuff. But it's hard to admit even to myself how in really feeling. I just want to shut myself away and ignore the world. I'm forcing myself to go out and meet friends. I had a truly lovely night Friday, but it really was only for those few hours I was out. I didn't get up until lunchtime the following day simply because I didn't have the dc to worry about, they were at my parents. Quite frankly if I didn't have to get up for them I know I wouldn't and its been a struggle to give the dts their morning milk and breakfast before dinner. That's just not fair on them!
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Our Antenatal and Postnatal Depression forum is a supportive space where you can share your postnatal depression experiences.
Antenatal/postnatal depression
Just need to let off steam.
5 replies
Sokmonsta · 15/04/2013 22:20
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.