Am posting here in the hopes of some support/ideas/help, as at the moment I'm really struggling.
I have a history of anxiety and OCD, and it gets worse when I'm pregnant and postnatally. I'm now 10 weeks pregnant with my third and it's probably the worst it's ever been.
I'm totally and utterly convinced I'm going to lose this baby - I've been particularly crampy and uncomfortable this time round (which various people have told me is totally normal with a third, particularly when carrying a chunky 22month old around), but every little twinge makes me think "this is the miscarriage starting". I spend my days obsessing over every symptom, googling things, and planning what I will do when I start bleeding. I'm finding it hard to plan going to things because I'm convinced I won't makeit because I'll be miscarrying. And then I'm terrified because if I miscarry, then I'll have to go through all this again if I want to have a (very very much wanted) third child.
I've told my GP, who told me I needed to "be strong" and that there's nothing they can do, I'm seeing a counsellor for unrelated anxiety, who has told me there is this this and this I can try "but now probably isn't the best time to be trying it", I've spoken to a midwife, who told me that I have to talk to my GP, and I've been back to another GP who has told me that after 12 weeks then I could maybe go on ADs again, but that they aren't keen on it, and who knows if the benefit is worth the risk, and that she would refer me through a different mental health service but there aren't any assessment places available for weeks and even then she doesn't know what would've available.
I'm at the end of my tether - the thought of another 6 months of this is horrendous (and I'm totally sure I won't get to full term - sure it will all have gone wrong before then). I have no idea where to go for help. I'm feeling pretty much abandoned with it all, and I'm so frustrated - I knew this would happen, I was proactive about it (I went and spoke to the GP when we were ttc to see if I could sort out some kind of support before it all went wrong, and she said to come back once I was pregnant) and now it has happened and I'm still left wondering where on earth I can turn for some help.
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1 reply
Apanicaday · 04/01/2013 19:32
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