To think most men's sexual repertoire is the same?

[littlestmummystop]

I've been single for 15 months now and had a few, ahem, encounters.

I've not had sex with all of them, but about six or seven ( or eight ) have come close. This is what gets me..

They ALL had EXACTLY the same repertoire. Kiss hard, without removing lips for few minutes, move hands under top, remove bra, pull top up, suck each nipple a bit. Then go for the waistband.

Quick fumble. [buscuit]

For first time I do tend not to take the lead, so maybe my fault, but do most men get told this is the way to do it ??

I find it really boring... and unromantic.

[Tryharder]

Are they one night stands? If is, these are generally not romantic.

[deaddei]

And if you bend over to pick something up, do you get a "while you're down there".....

[GypsyMoth]

one night stand,first date...whatever....they all have to start somewhere....

[seenyertoeslately]

Perhaps you always go for the same type of man? Or maybe it is the same man, in different disguises?

What were you hoping for?

[foreverastudent]

go for someone who's young and maleable enough for you to train them exactly they way you want them

[paisleyleaf]

Well it's sort of in line with that first base, second base thing.

[seenyertoeslately]

OP I've just reread your description of their clumsy attempts and it does imply that you are not reacting at all - just kind of standing there and letting it happen. Poor blokes probably don't know what to do, other than follow the routine they've been using since they were 14.

[lazarusb]

What forever said- worked for me

[slushy]

I have had more than I can count quite a few one nighters partners and I have to say you sound like the boring one, why don't you take the lead and do something really fun let go it is a one nighter after all you will never see him again. I guarantee you will have lots more fun.

[nagoo]

It's that 'tits first, I'm not a slag' thing, isn't it?

Think that you need to lead a bit, especailly if you are not planning to see them again, you can't really get worried about embarassing yourself, can you?

[AgentZigzag]

It doesn't really matter if they all start off the same, it's when he and you get warmed up that's the interesting and different bit.

The starting off is what gets you going, and if you haven't got it on with them then it's bound to be a bit...frustrating?

You've got some will power not going past that part!

[HecateQueenOfWitches]

Take control.

[JuJusDad]

[HecateQueenOfWitches]

I remember that I rather used to like having my hair pulled and being thrown about a bit and the odd slap.

I'm not sure that's something you should try unless you are very sure the woman won't run screaming from the room, however.

I think the problem is that one-size-fits-all doesn't work. Everyone is so different that what someone did with the person before is not what they can do with the next person. They need to start from scratch.

Ideally people would communicate their needs and likes and dislikes. But people can get naked and shove things in places nothing was ever meant to be shoved and do things that would shock SGB but seem unable to actually talk about sex.

Weird. innit?

[JuJusDad]

[HecateQueenOfWitches]

and if anyone sniggers at my use of 'one size fits all' I shall make you stand in the corner, facing the wall, until you stop being childish

[HecateQueenOfWitches]

ahem.

Shall I use my invisibilty for evil, or to fight crime?...

[JuJusDad]

sorry, Hec. Obviously cross posted with you, without seeing your earlier post.

[overmydeadbody]

Yes OP, they're unromantic because they are sexual encounters, not relationships.


Not all men do it like this.

It takes two OP, you;re not meant to just stand there... spice things up a little, take the lead.

[HecateQueenOfWitches]

nah JuJus, I know that. I was just teasing.

[PortiaNovmerriment]

OP, you have to head them off at the pass and just straddle them at the snogging stage. HTH.

[Dominique07]

lms what do you want them to do?

[littlestmummystop]

No not all one night stands.

And, of course, I don't act like a virgin queen through-out. However lots and lots and lots of men start with this boring first base/ second base approach.

I'd much rather be kissed more, caressed more, slooowly led into something. I try and do that. Hard when they seem rigidly following the same act they did behind the bike shed though.

[CaptainKirksNipples]

If you don't enjoy the routine that much then take control and do something else. If you enjoy kissing then tell them they are great at it and do it for longer.