To go to Italy on my own?

[desisions]

When I first met DP, one thing we had in common was a supposed interest in travel. He, however had never been out of the country I gave him the benefit of the doubt and assumed circumstances, finances, ex wife etc all stood in the way. So we got discussing holidays and we decided to book a holiday abroad for us and the kids. I started to save up a deposit, he didn't. I asked why not and he said he still needed to buy himself and his son a passport!!! So feeling a bit frustrated with it all I told him to get a move on and buy the bloody passports. He said he'd start saving for them. Anyway, as it happens, we can't take the kids away on holiday now due to exams/sats/starting new schools etc so instead, DP suggested a dutch dash for just him and me. I agreed. Then after months of me assuming he'd been saving, he tells me he was having thoughts as "someone at work" said they were crap . So, last attempt at getting abroad, I suggested a few days (maybe 4) in Italy. He agreed and said he was really excited about it. He actively started saving too so all looked positive. But of course, we needed someone to look after the kids for 5 nights. I asked my parents if she would have DS, she agreed. He told me he was asking his parents about having his DS. So, a few days later I said "did you get a text back off your dad yet?" and he replied "actually, I've not text HIM yet, I'll do it tonight" Next morning I asked if he'd done it, he said "no I forgot, I'll do it when I get in from work" I got impatient and said "will you just do it now please?" so he said "actually, I'm popping in to see dad after work, it will be better if I ask face to face". So - fair enough, can't argue with that one. That night he came home, I asked "what did he say?" he asked "who?" so I said "your dad!! about having DSS??" and he replied "oh crap, I forgot to ask".

So anyway 3 weeks have gone past, he has still not arranged child-care and I've noticed he's drawn money out of his holiday savings. I have decided that since my DS's childcare has already been arranged, I'll just go to Italy on my own. I'm sick of waiting around for him. Its been nearly 2 years of messing around, wasting time "trying" to organise some kind of a holiday. When I tell him, he'll go ballistic and it will all blow up into a HUGE row, I know it will but what option do I have? just sit around and not go anywhere because he can't be arsed? I have no problems with being in a country on my own. My only concern is DP as I know he will kick off.

[Thediaryofanobody]

YANBU I would seriously have doubts about someone who can't make a commitment to go on holiday and then when he does breaks it off for pathetic reasons.
Go to italy you'll have a fabulous time I love traveling by myself.

[VinegarTits]

Has he said he is not going? he is obviously dragging his feet for some reason, so if i were you i would make it clear 'i hope you have sorted out your childcare, because i am going on this holiday with or without you'

hopefully he will get his arse into gear

if he does kick off then he is a fuckwit, and i would be asking myself why am i with him?

[AllarmBells]

When is the trip due to start?

Sounds like he is either genuinely nervous about his first time abroad, or he doesn't really want to go and thinks dragging his heels will stop it happening.

I wouldn't drop it on him on the departure day that his cunning plan hasn't worked.

I would keep asking him calmly "Have you arranged your childcare yet? Don't leave it too late, will you, otherwise you won't be able to come with me..."

And go. Have a fab time

[desisions]

Thank you diaryof, can I be nosey and ask what countries you've been to alone and what was it like?

[FabIsGoingToGetFit]

You really ought to go.

[Rosa]

IS he scared of flying or something?
I would go ahead and plan it and then say 'right this is it I am booking in the morning so are you in or out?'

[Mouseface]

You should go. You'll be fine.

I took DD when she was 3 to Majorca and we had a fab time. ExP was being a prick so I went without him.

The locals were fab, they loved her and it wasn't even a family resort, it was a quiet little village........ can't remember the name....... another senior moment.

We ate out early and spent days at the beach. We even took a coach trip around the coast.

Have a brilliant time.

[Thediaryofanobody]

desisions I've been mainly to European countries myself. I used to go to Paris a lot for a day or two when I lived in London, lived in Munich myself when I was 18 for 6 months and been to Budapest.
Went to Venice with DH but spent 2 days going around alone due to him being ill, I had a lovely time and would really recommend Venice to any woman traveling alone.

[flibbertigibbert]

You should go. When I've been to Italy I've always found people to be extremely friendly and helpful. I ended up doing a weekend in Amsterdam by myself after the Dutch friend I was supposed to stay with had a family emergency across the country. It was fine.

I would be seriously annoyed with DP though. Does he have a secret fear of flying or foreigners?

[Thediaryofanobody]

Sorry pressed post to soon what it was like well I did what I wanted when I wanted so was great IMO.
My tip would be to find a nice hotel that you would feel comfortable in if you didn't want to stay in your room in the evening you can go to the bar, sit in the lobby or eat in the restaurant. I generally don't go out in the evenings but if I do I always ask the hotel staff where is safe.