For calling DP an arsehole?

[TheFresherGrass]

DP bought himself a laptop 3 days ago. He's not had much time on it and a new game he'd bought arrived today so I thought I'd stay out of his way, get stuff done upstairs and leave him on his laptop all afternoon. He certainly seemed to apreciate the idea!

So I've upstairs getting my college work done from 2pm until 5pmish. At 5pm I'm really starting to get bored so I go downstairs and sit next to DP on the sofa and cuddle up to him. He then shouted at me that I've just "Got him killed" and wrecked his game . Bare in mind he'd been playing the same game for 3+ hours. So I said "I only came downstairs for a quick cuddle, I'll bugger of back upstairs now ... " and he replied "don't be daft".

So, fully intending to leave him to it for a few more hours I go to give him one more hug and he literally throws my hand away (which really hurt as my bones dislocate v. easy) and shouts "NO NEED FOR THAT! FREEZING COLD HANDS ON ME FOR GODS SAKE".

So I stood up and called him an arsehole.

He's since apologised but said I'm more out of line for "name-calling". Am I???

Thing is he only seems interested in me when sex is on offer. In bed on a night he'll "harrass" me for sex for an hour+ and once he realises he's not getting any he turns over and goes to sleep. No hug or anything. If he was guaranteed sex though you could be sure of him offering a hug or two.

The only night we said we'd sit down together and watch a movie at 8.30pm. So it gets to 8pm and DP says "I still need to fit in some laptop time" so I said "are we still watching that movie at 8.30?" and he said "yes! but I've not been on the laptop today yet, have I?? can't believe you're whinging over me going on the laptop. I do need some enjoyable time you know". So I bit the bait and said "so, watching a movie with me is a chore is it?" and he replied "that's not recreational though is it? it's TV time. I want recreational time"

I feel like I have to beg him to spend any time with me.

AIBU? I'm not a needy person but I don't think the odd hug is too much to ask is it???

[LaurieFairyCake]

He is being arseholey though.

I think you should go out - he clearly can't be arsed spending time with you this evening. Go to the cinema and buy a nice tub of ben and jerry's to yourself

Don't beg - go out instead.

[copperjar]

He is an arsehole though. That is just a statement of fact.

[PiratePrincess]

Get the laptop.

Pick up a hammer.

Strike the laptop with the hammer.

Job done!

[Swanky]

I can't believe you even need to ask! What a tool!

[compo]

God these little things are x100 when you have kids together so if your on here cos you're ttc you may need a rethink
men who are selfish with their time pre kids are doublet crap when they are asked to spend all weekend doing family stuff
I know cos my dh is always moaning on abiut it

[baskingseals]

definitely yanbu.

leave him to it.
arsehole

[FabIsGoingToGetFit]

I know I should say YABU but

YANBU once I have read the whole post.

How about putting his laptop in bed and you sleep elsewhere. Let him shag that.

[fearnelinen]

Hmm...laptop time = recreational time?
Constantly asking for sex?
YANBU, leave him to it, go out, find something more interesting to do, don't beg.

[Tidey]

What a cock.

[Dinkytinky]

YANBU- he was being an arsehole! I hate how affection and sex only go together for some men, my dp included. He's alright for the odd kiss and cuddle but at bed time it always offend me that the cuddlings over as soon as I say I'm not interested!
He will get tired of the laptop in a few weeks but you should be doing things to make yourself happy- maybe take up yoga or make yourself unavailable so he doesn't take you for granted as much