atwnw , the toddler only got to pick 1 chip from ds plate then i pulled the plate away & said no , otherwise yes i would have had to get ds a new meal , the toddlers just sat there picking their noses & staring at us (yuk) i was more annoyed at their parent tbh even after the barman had words with the father he still let the kids come back over to us .
verygreen thats lovely , i agree with motherbeyond it is great when some1 awards dc's for their manners ,

And what a way to end a bad day, if this had happened to me I would have insisted that the parents paid for another meal, I wouldn't have let my DD eat anything after a couple of toddlers had had their mits on it.

And shame on the parents as ultimately it's their fault.

You're right, manners do matter. I was very very proud when ds1 (6) came home with a sticker from school saying he was the only boy out of 20 heard to say please and thank you to the dinner ladies at lunch

well done you ,for putting in the hard work at the start.it's not THAT difficult to lay down the basic rules and mold as you go along.
though you'd think so,as so many people don't bother.i
n the end,it'll be the kids who come off worse.noone wants to be friends with a brat.and brattish children who get away with whatever they want,usually turn into adults who are morons.and again,who want to be friends with/marry/work with, a tit?!
it's nice when you are rewarded for your diligence by an acknowledgment,such as the one your son got at the cinema.
nice for the parents.
nice for the child(as you point out..he was chuffed)
nice for the recipricant of said good manners!
everyone's a winner {grin]

we too have insisted on good manners since a very early age but not all parents do that any more hence SO many little brats darlings .

thanks pitchounette, finally some1 on here that understands the situation , i also am a bit shocked at some of the replies ,
motherbeyond we also have had people commenting on how well behaved our dc's are its lovely when you can take the dcs anywhere & not have to hang your head in shame at their behaviour . my son (10) went to the cinema with my dh last month & the man serving them their treats gave my son 2 large bags of sweets for free just because my son used his manners the man told my dh it was very refreshing to see such a polite boy my ds was chuffed with himself & we are very proud .
motherbeyond we also have nephews (like your own) that are exactly the same in fact i have had to stop having parties in the house for our dc's because it means having to invite these nephews along , last year the 6yr old took batteries out of TV remote & i caught his hand just b4 he threw them at TV screen ( new lcd tv) & likewise their mother never corrects them,

me too by the way...my rant was directed at parents of the other children..not you op!sometimes it's difficult to know what to do in situations such as these.people are unpredictable,and you don't want a potential scene in front of your d.c's.plus,you had had a bad night(we ALL empathise with how that feels)and couldn't face it.they were totally to blame

woodlands35, I am a bit at some of the answers on this thread.

I can understand why most people say you should have had been more assertive but FGS the parents of these toddlers should have kept them under control! Full stop!

I can also understand why you didn't enjoy your meal. I am certainly more ssertive than you. (I probably have taken the children back to their table and tell the parents :'Are your cgildren yours? Their were eating in my dcs plate.' - I might add 'I am worried they are going to catch the flu as my ds1 has it atm??? to scare them of ) but I know it would have had an effect on how much I would have enjoyed the meal anyway.

Hope you will enjoy your next meal out better

what kazzi said

and lolgoblin!

god,can't abide it when wet parents say things like'oh,they're only little,they don't understand,i don't want to upset them...etc' they bleedin' DO understand,from a very early age.when are you going to teach them how to behave in public if not from the beginning?
are you gonna wait until they go to school and start picking food off the other kids' plates in the dinner hall..they'll be popular then,won't they?

my children are 3 and 16 months and there is no way they would do that.my 3 year old has excellent table manners,through hard work/repitition on our part.waitresses often comment how well beahved they are and how much easier/less stressful it makes their job.

their cousins on the other hand,are 6,9 and 10.they are a complete nightmare and i will go to great lenghts to avoid a social situation if they will be attending.

they tear the place up whilst their parents sit deliberately ignoring them(which takes some doing,let me tell ya). The 5 year old took someone's handbag off the table at my dd's christening and flung it accross the room spilling the contents everywhere.
everyone looked at the bag.then looked at the mum.who looked away!
bottom line,people make excuses for their kid's behaviour because they can't be arsed instilling the basics.

aaaaand exhale!

Pick one up, put it on your knee and feed it from your plate whilst crooning 'Poor starving babe'
Watch the panic spread.