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AIBU?

For thinking of finishing with someone because of their dress sense?

17 replies

SmellyEggs · 23/04/2009 18:27

Been seeing a man for a few weeks. He always dresses quite scruffy in baggy clothes, some of which have holes in. He says the reason for this is that he is in the process of dieting so doesn't see the point in buying new clothes yet. Fair enough ... stuff like that doesn't usually bother me.

Anyway we went out one night, a quiet drink and cinema and although I didn't get "dressed up", I did make an effort and wore my best jeans and a nice top, bit of make-up, hair done nice etc (it was a saturday night). He turned up in baggy jeans and a black t-shirt with a dragon on the front. He told me it was one of his favourite shirts ... it was horrible and people were staring at us!

Anyway we went out yesterday for lunch and he said he was in the process of buying new clothes. "thank god" I thought to myself ... until he described a t-shirt he had his eye on .....

"It's a black t-shirt with a picture of a Phoenix on the front with a lovely 'flame' design around it"

ffs, sounds like something my 8 year old would wear. (for those that don't know, a phoenix is a mythical bird that bursts into flames and is reborn from its own ashes). V.Geeky

I admit, he embarrasses me when he dresses like this. I'm only 28, he dresses like he's either 13 or 60.

AIBU? would this put you off?

OP posts:
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themildmanneredjanitor · 23/04/2009 18:29

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dittany · 23/04/2009 18:30

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EyeballsintheSky · 23/04/2009 18:38

So he wore a pair of baggy jeans and a t shirt to the cinema? I can't see your problem tbh. Sounds more like a bit of a rocker to me. Presumably he was wearing clothes when you met him, so you must have had an idea of his dress sense because his old 'fat' clothes would still be along the same line as his new thin clothes will be.

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Flibbertyjibbet · 23/04/2009 18:39

If you liked him you wouldn't notice his clothes.

If just his clothes are putting you off then put the poor guy out of his misery and dump him.

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Nancy66 · 23/04/2009 18:40

People are going to say you're being shallow but I think these things matter. If you'd be too embarrassed to introduce him to your friends and family then there isn't much future in it.

Personally I really don't think I could be with a bloke that had tattoos or wore jewellery - it's just such a massive, massive turn off for me. So nope, don't think you are being unreasonable.

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Lizzylou · 23/04/2009 18:42

If you liked him you would already have dreamt up your fantasy wardrobe for him.

When I met DH he dressed v badly, but I could spot potential so I just hung on in there and dropped heavy hints/took him shopping.

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ilove · 23/04/2009 18:42

Deja-vu reading this thread...

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123andaway · 23/04/2009 18:44

It would put me off too - YANBU.

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Overmydeadbody · 23/04/2009 18:45

yanbu

If he was just clueless and needed a bit of guidance to develop a better dress sense I'd say persevere, but it sounds like he has definate tastes that you don't like, so don't waste your or his time.

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muggglewump · 23/04/2009 18:47

Haven't you posted this before?

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MatthewBellamysMuse · 23/04/2009 18:48

Can you 'educate' him, perhaps? Go shopping with him and make a few suggestions?

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piscesmoon · 23/04/2009 18:49

I'm shallow-it would put me off!

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expatinscotland · 23/04/2009 18:50

Gawd, dump him already. It's not like you've deloped a serious connection with him. Life's too short to deal if you don't want to.

Move on to someone you find you're more compatible with.

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expatinscotland · 23/04/2009 18:50

Gawd, dump him already. It's not like you've deloped a serious connection with him. Life's too short to deal if you don't want to.

Move on to someone you find you're more compatible with.

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brettgirl2 · 23/04/2009 18:56

I've trained my DH to be a man with good dress sense. It took me 10 years though!

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BrokenFlipFlop · 23/04/2009 18:57

Can I just ask why you're with him - you don't like his dress sense and you've admitted in another thread that he embarrasses you easily ...

I don't get it.

Would it be worth talking to him and communicating your concerns perhaps?

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TrinityIsLovingHerLittleRhino · 23/04/2009 19:00

nooooooo
dont talk to him about it
he can like what he wants

leave him and let him find someone who likes him how he is

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