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AIBU?

to think child maintenance options shouldn't allow this?

19 replies

AllIEverSeemToSayIsNo · 28/07/2014 07:48

I made a claim for dc. At the beginning of the year.

I had to chose the option if where cmo takes the money off exp and gives me it through abuse.

At the start he was paying £7per week for 2dC.

Now he's working. I had to keep phoning them to tell them where he is working and his hours.

On Friday I asked what was happening as he was telling people he is paying me a "good wack of maintenance" I was told he has to pay £7 per week as he on low wages. When querried this they looked into what was his wages etc.

The person who I was on the phone to said that they used last years checks which exp was on benefits for.

He then said exp actually phoned up and told them his wages were over 50%higher then what the cmo were using. Exp was told he had 2weeks to pass his pay slips in. He never passed them in to them to recheck and now the 2weeks is up so all dds are entitled to is £3.50 per week per child.

AIBU to think cmo shouldn't allow this to happeb? Exp has even told them he's getting much more. He then claims he really loves his children but he won't pay what he should.

How can fathers sleep when they know they are not paying what they should for their children. It really annoys me cmo is allowing it and exp is following it.

Cmo is now going to start to use the service. What is the point in using a service and paying them to rip children off. The money what I was getting before never even went into my purse. I split it and give each child half. So its not about the money its the principle.

OP posts:

Report

AllIEverSeemToSayIsNo · 28/07/2014 07:50

Start to charge for the service. Not use the service.

OP posts:

AllIEverSeemToSayIsNo · 28/07/2014 15:24

Anyone?

OP posts:

SiennaBlake · 28/07/2014 15:32

Why aren't they contacting his employer for proof? I thought they could do that?

AllIEverSeemToSayIsNo · 28/07/2014 15:35

I don't know first time I've used cmo.

The person on phone said they use HMRC.

OP posts:

Teddybeau1988 · 28/07/2014 15:37

£3.50 a week!?!
DH gives his ex £30 for their DD each week.

burgatroyd · 28/07/2014 15:41

CSA are bloody useless. After two years of chasing them I gave up.

Morethanalittlebitconfused · 28/07/2014 15:45

They need to be approaching his employer to put a Deduction of Earnings order in place

DiaDuit · 28/07/2014 15:46

OP ring them every day and keep insisting they contact his employer and get his real wage amount. ring every day and make a real nuisance of yourself, make sure that when they hear your name they're thinking "oh fuck here she is again" and eventually they'll just do what needs done to stop having to deal with you. squeaky wheel gets the oil. it's always the way.

GinAndSonic · 28/07/2014 15:47

I get £7 per week between my 2 kids. Its a joke. Because hes on benefits. Boohoo. So was i until recently but it still cost me more than 50p per child, per day to fulfil my responsibilities as a parent.

AllIEverSeemToSayIsNo · 28/07/2014 20:07

I will phone them tomorrow to sort it. The calculator says he should be pay in £60 per week. It really annoys me what he is doing.

He has 2jobs and does other cash in hand jobs as well but he says as I'm on benefits (can't get a job yet with where I'm living and really want a job) he shouldn't have to pay a penny.

OP posts:

TOADfan · 28/07/2014 20:15

They can contact his employer... but only if they have it.
If they don't have his employers details they have to go by evidence he provides or HMRC. It gets picked up at the annual review .

If you know his employer you can tell them and they can chase it up.

Also cmo are a different company from CMS, XML just give advice it is CMS who does the collection and liabilities.

ScrambledEggAndToast · 28/07/2014 22:13

So many NRPs have got no shame, mine included. I have just started to receive money from his benefits 4 weeks ago but they managed to muck that up so even though it should have been £10 per fortnight I have had £1.75 and £3.99. He told my son he is just about to get £3000 from a company he used to work for that went into administration and is finally paying everyone. I doubt I will see a penny of that either.

Sorry for the thread hijack. I just know exactly what you are going through OP and it's so frustrating when they don't give a damn. Where do they think we get the money from?

fluffymouse · 28/07/2014 22:24

He sounds like a prize Dick.

Unfortunately cmo seem to have very little power in this country.

I would support a change to the us system where not paying child support means losing your driving license/going to jail.

choochootrain1 · 28/07/2014 23:48

That's redicilous! I was asked when I had to use the service if they would need to go through his employer and gave his employers details so they could - seems like the service is very unfair with different strokes for different folks (probably depends on which administrator you get connected to during your call)

GinAndSonic · 29/07/2014 15:29

On my initial call to Cmo we concluded that due to my circumstances (domestic abuse, harrassment, etc) that i should use the collect and pay service where CMS handle the payments. When i then was passed through to CMS the man i spoke to was very dismissive of my concerns, kept going on about how keeping it amicable between us and arranging how payments are made between us is best for my kids, and how when the charges come in my ex can opt out of collect and pay to avoid charges which could delay my money blah blah blah, and basically refused to accept me saying i wanted collect and pay because i was afraid and forced me to agree to the one where they make the calculation and ex pays me directly. I came off the call in tears. I had to call them back and spoke to someone else about it, had it changed to collect and pay and lodged a complaint against the man i spoke to.

googoodolly · 29/07/2014 15:38

I would ring his employer and get them to contact the CSA and put in a Deduction of Earnings order. DP pays £300 per month for his DC and it's done through the CSA, simply because it's easier. It means he can prove what he's paid each month should he have to, and it also means that all his deductions are sorted when he recieves his pay, so we can budget a lot easier.

His ex doesn't let him see his DC most of the time, but he still pays his maintenance on a regular basis and would never accept paying less than what he owes. They're his KIDS. I don't get how people can sleep at night when they have children they're not supporting.

Good luck OP.

AllIEverSeemToSayIsNo · 05/08/2014 06:52

I have spent every day they are open on the phone.

I seemed to get either a nice women or she was just fed up of the constant calls. I told her both employers he uses and what working tax credits he gets.

She looked into the claim and said "no he's on benefits" so I replied "just look he is working, I have proof" she put me on hold then came back and said "you are right. I have just did a check on him" so now they are stopping the £7 per week payments as it wouldn't come through anyways as he's not on benefits.

So now they are giving him another chance to agree to pay (I use the service where they take it from him and give me it through abuse) if not they are going to his employer. His employers will need to be searched for as I don't know the exact address of them.

I've also told social worker and everyone involved what he is doing as he is hanging up when cmo phones and says who they are. How can he stand there and says he really loves Hus children when he's not providing for them. He also couldn't provide one meal for DC when he has contact.

I never thought he would be like this.

OP posts:

AllIEverSeemToSayIsNo · 05/08/2014 06:56

Im going to give cmo a little time as they said he will have 2weeks to decide. So I'm going to give them a week to make sure all is OK then another week. Its not about the money as it won't be coming to me. Its actually for nursery fees so the DC get to socialise and its until I get the funding for DC.

If it was the opposite way round he would keep asking for money for clothes etc not be happy with his maintenance. He has really really changes but then again I never really knew him at all.

OP posts:

Meglet · 05/08/2014 07:06

The new system is going to make life worse for kids. NRP's with private agreements will be able to piss around even more . But that's the Tories for you, gotta make savings somewhere and kids of separated parents are the best targets (again).

XP has always paid, on the dot, via the CSA. We haven't seen him in 5yrs so I won't be attempting a private agreement, we'll go straight to the new CSA and lose money as a result.

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