Short version: DS has civil partner who was AMAB but is genderfluid and presents as m or f variously (pronoun "they"). DS presents as very within the norm. They have both been invited (after I asked, and was given the go ahead, to include spouse on the invite as they originally weren't, not I think necessarily on purpose) to my aunt's 70th. Then she calls asking if spouse is very "out there" (her words) - to which I answered honestly - and then asking me to make sure that they dress male at the party so as not to make other guests feel uncomfortable.
Aside from the fact I don't want DS and spouse to feel we are trying to tell two fully grown adults what to do, AIBU to feel that maybe my aunt should have asked them about this herself?
In the end it is entirely possible they may not be able to come as it's BH weekend and they may already have plans, however... I don't want to have to have this conversation, if I am perfectly honest, as I'm sure DS and spouse get enough of this kind of thing as it is. OTOH I do kind of see her point, as it will be a party full of oaps and religious people due to their church connections and would hope that DS and spouse would want to be tactful. On the third hand DS does often get on his high horse about similar issues - indeed a lot of issues, lol, takes after his father. And there is no way that, if it came up (and it would) he would be anything other than "this is my spouse, deal with it" (slightly more politely but not much).
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
to feel awkward about raising this with DS and spouse?
91 replies
evilartsgraduate · 24/07/2014 00:26
OP posts:
ObfusKate ·
24/07/2014 00:32
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
ObfusKate ·
24/07/2014 00:56
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.