To find it amusing how some people get angry when others won't give in to their demands?

(40 Posts)
floraldora Fri 11-Jul-14 17:26:38

DD (age 15) has a friend that she has known since primary school. Her friend's mum is ok, but I've always kept a bit of a distance because she is very demanding and there is much foot stamping and tantrumming (from the mum) if she doesn't get her own way.

DD has come home this afternoon:

"X says her mum says you've got to call her tonight because she wants to talk about the London trip with you"

Me: "If she wants to talk to me, she can call me. I don't call people when they demand that I have to call them"

DD relayed the information to her friend that the mum needs to call me if she wants to speak to me, and is now getting text messages from her friend saying how cross the mum is that I haven't called her.

After witnessing quite a lot of this type of behaviour from the mum over the years, I am actually finding it quite amusing imagining her spitting feathers because I don't say "how high?" when she demands that I jump.

MrsWinnibago Fri 11-Jul-14 17:30:17

YABU. It all sounds a bit petty really.

CoffeeTea103 Fri 11-Jul-14 17:31:29

Sounds like a playground issues with both your dds caught in the middle.

floraldora Fri 11-Jul-14 17:32:47

No playground issues from me.

Do you just do what someone demands of you all the time?

OutragedFromLeeds Fri 11-Jul-14 17:33:29

I don't know if 'can your mum call me?' is a demand really. Isn't she just asking so that you can call at a time convenient to you?

I agree it all sounds a bit petty.

WorraLiberty Fri 11-Jul-14 17:34:10

I could well have been that "Can you ask your Mum to call me when she's free"...might have turned into "You've got to call her".

I would've just called her tbh.

ViviPru Fri 11-Jul-14 17:34:12

Talking on the phone? <shudder>

floraldora Fri 11-Jul-14 17:34:26

It was said that I 'had to call her'

This is how the mum speaks and makes demands all the time.

She has my number. Surely she could have phoned me or sent a text if it was that important?

SaucyJack Fri 11-Jul-14 17:34:52

YABU to find it amusing- sounds like you're playing power games just as much as she is.

If you'd just quietly waited for her to ring you that would be different and perfectly reasonable.

TheXxed Fri 11-Jul-14 17:35:03

I don't understand, asking someone to call is for your convenience surely.

floraldora Fri 11-Jul-14 17:35:09

Perhaps I am just irked because I have had many cheeky demands from this mum over the years and I've had enough?

SquigglySquid Fri 11-Jul-14 17:35:35

Does she not have your phone number? confused

I have an aunt that's like this, demanding and prone to tantrums. I just sort of shrug it off and do my own thing.

I like to sort of "misunderstand" and brush people off when they get demanding.

"Get me a glass of water"
"Oh sure! Glasses are over there." smile

Then they get the option of trying to explain that they actually wanted me to do it, or they can just do it themselves. Sometimes I get passive aggressive, and do it wrong or forget their request when I wander off The point is to make it a lost cause because I don't give them fuel for a tantrum and they don't get what they want.

SiennaBlake Fri 11-Jul-14 17:35:48

Oh dear. Sounds like the other mums "can you ask her to call me when she's free" has been translated poorly and you've been quite petty about it.

ViviPru Fri 11-Jul-14 17:36:07

<shudder and thrice <shudder>

indigo18 Fri 11-Jul-14 17:36:26

I think you both need to grow up. Feel sorry for your daughter.

floraldora Fri 11-Jul-14 17:37:09

She wouldn't have said the sentence that you have quoted, SiennaBlake. It would have been a demand

OutragedFromLeeds Fri 11-Jul-14 17:37:16

It was said that you had to call her from her to her Dd, to your Dd, to you. Have you ever played Chinese whispers?

SiennaBlake Fri 11-Jul-14 17:38:05

So more like "get her to call me when she's free"? It still sounds petty to me.

floraldora Fri 11-Jul-14 17:39:15

As I have said, the mum is very demanding and has made that type of demand before.

floraldora Fri 11-Jul-14 17:40:12

No Sienna, she more than likely would have said "Tell X's mum she's got to call me". Big difference

SiennaBlake Fri 11-Jul-14 17:41:12

Oh well, if she said it like that, id say yanbu not to call! That would irritate me too.

SirNoel Fri 11-Jul-14 17:42:12

I think something's been lost in translation

floraldora Fri 11-Jul-14 17:43:07

I probably am being unreasonable and I probably am being childish, but I have really had enough of the mum barking orders at me and always expecting things to go her own way. It is things like if the girls are out together the mum will send me a text "You will have to bring X home as I'm busy". There are never any pleases, thank yous, or acknowledgement that I don't actually answer to her or have to do as she says

HayDayQueen Fri 11-Jul-14 17:44:48

I agree, it is amusing when someone gets the huff when thing don't go their way.

A few mums like that at school atm, organising all sorts of things and getting the hump when you don't jump up and help/join in straight away! I do help and go to as lots of events, so refuse to give in and feel guilty because they think THEIR things are that much more important than everything else in people's lives.....

I got stuck between my MIL-to-be and my mum - each wanted to have a chat with the other about the wedding, but neither of them would ring the other.

In the end I got quite sharp with my mum, and told her that I didn't want to be stuck between the two of them, and would she please just stop being so stubborn and phone my MIL-to-be.

For the sake of your dd, couldn't you swallow your pride and just ring the woman?

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