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AIBU?

to be unsure of how to pay my respects??

20 replies

Dumplings4ever · 13/04/2014 20:35

I have noticed that, in recent years, the minutes silence to mark respect for past events has increasingly been replaced with a minutes applause.

I watched 2 football matches this afternoon to mark the 25th anniversary of the Hillsborough disaster. One match saw an imbeccably observed silence - you could hear a pin drop. The other match saw a few seconds silence then a round of applause for the rest of the remembrance period.

Not really sure how I feel about this new "method" of showing respect.

I really can't imagine our war veterans standing around the cenotaph on November 11th clapping for 2 minutes yet, at a football match it seem acceptable. BUT if we have one "rule" for one event and one "rule" for another where do you differentiate.

The nations silence on the 11th of November could see shoppers clapping in the aisles of Asda rather than standing in respectful silence. Really not sure of where I stand on this new way of remembering.

Views please

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RachelWatts · 13/04/2014 20:39

It's much more difficult for a 1 minute applause to be disrupted by people being disrespectful by shouting inappropriately.

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PortofinoRevisited · 13/04/2014 20:53

I went to the Cenotaph once on Rembrance Sunday - a very moving occasion nearly spoiled by people taking photos and movies on their phones. Sad

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withextradinosaurs · 13/04/2014 20:59

Apparently it's an Italian custom (according to the Guardian) and was adopted by football clubs. I think, as long as people remember why they are doing it, it's fine. Perhaos we should applaud our veterans, they bloody deserve it.

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DesperatelySeekingSedatives · 13/04/2014 21:01

Huge groups of people don't usually disrespect the 2 minute silence for Armistice day. Well I've never seen that.

When it comes to marking the 96 at Hillsborough though that's another story for some clubs (not all the fans but enough). Chelsea I'm looking at you so I think the applause would work well in that way. However it stinks that that should have to happen because of certain people.

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DesperatelySeekingSedatives · 13/04/2014 21:03

x-post. didn't know that. And yes the veterans deserve masses of applause. So maybe that's something to consider?

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thebody · 13/04/2014 21:05

As long as the people applauding it/standing in silence are respectful then can't see the difference.

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Shukran · 13/04/2014 21:25

I've been to football matches where people have jeered during a silence, it was before the alcohol ban in stadiums in Scotland though. No telling a drunk when to be quiet but as pp says they can't disrupt applause.

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softlysoftly · 13/04/2014 21:37

I think the bigger question is should they be doing it at all?

The meaning of the minutes silence is being eroded from overuse.

Hillsborough was tragic but those people got hurt at a football match. It shouldn't be treated the same as the thousands who gave their lives against evil.

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ForalltheSaints · 13/04/2014 21:37

Silence when it is a sudden death, applause if someone dies after a long life well lived is I think the appropriate way. The game I was at yesterday had perfectly observed silence.

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thebody · 13/04/2014 21:41

forallthesaints yes agree with your distinction there.

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ImNotCrazy · 13/04/2014 21:47

I thought they did the applause at football matches as it has been known for a minute's silence to be ruined by the minority of disrespectful idiots whereas it is much harder for them to be heard over an applause but yet still is still an acknowledgement.

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Dumplings4ever · 13/04/2014 21:47

Softlysoftly - I have no problem with the remembering of the 96. I truly believe that such actions as remembering them publically give great comfort to their relatives.

TBH the more I think of it the more I'm in favour of silence. It gives us time to reflect and remember in our own way.

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Pagwatch · 13/04/2014 21:50

Just do what you feel is appropriate.
There is no real right or wrong. I prefer silence but if others clap..[shrug]

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JennySense · 13/04/2014 21:53

I was very moved by the silence for the 96 today at Anfield.

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Northernlurker · 13/04/2014 23:19

Silence or applause - DOES it matter? I don't think so. What matters is remembering 96 adults and children who died horribly in circumstances that should never have happened nor must ever be allowed to happen again.

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Burren · 13/04/2014 23:37

I think applause is out of place in the context of remembrance, unless the deceased or memorialised person/people were performers of some kind, who would have been acknowledged with applause during their lives.

With specific regards to the dead of Hillsborough, though, I suppose the intent may have been to applaud the fact of the new inquests this year and the hope that justice will finally be done, in some sense?

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Ijustworemytrenchcoat · 13/04/2014 23:45

Was one of them the Chelsea match? I saw the Chelsea match, and while it showed the crowd observing the silence, I could hear one section of the crowd chanting/cheering I think. I hope I'm wrong and one small section didn't spoil the tribute.

I prefer the silence though, anything else seems disrespectful to me.

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Ludways · 13/04/2014 23:46

I know that one club yesterday started the applause to drown out one idiot who was shouting and swearing. They didn't want this idiots voice to be the only thing heard.

It's been applause at football batches for a while now. I think it's just as nice as silence.

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plecofjustice · 14/04/2014 00:29

I watched 2 football matches this afternoon to mark the 25th anniversary of the Hillsborough disaster. One match saw an imbeccably observed silence - you could hear a pin drop. The other match saw a few seconds silence then a round of applause for the rest of the remembrance period.

Presumably the silence was Anfield and the applause the Chelsea game?

To be fair, you can't really compare them - of course it's right that Anfield be silent, for many of the fans and some of the players, Hillsborough is raw, real and immediate to them. Chelsea? Maybe too separated, and, as other posters have said, too much possibility of disruption to risk a silence.

In this country, it's pretty unheard of for anyone to disrupt the Armistice silence with chanting and abuse, but where it has happened, people have made respectful noise (singing, praying, applause, whatever) to drown it out. I would have no problem raising my voice in respectful song during the Armstice silence if it was the only way to drown out hatred and disrespect. However, I'd rather maintain a silence, and intend to be silent on Tuesday for Hillsborough too.

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withextradinosaurs · 14/04/2014 22:51

Is it the contrast that makes it significant? We expect applause and cheeri at a sports game, so to stand in silence is a very special tribute and a few moments taken out of the normal day.

We should remember the 96, but we should also remember the victims of the fire in Bradford too. They were victims of a badly-maintained ground and should also have gone home to their families.

It is important to remember Hillsborough and the other events where those in authority on the day have avoided being held to account. They must never be allowed to think we have forgotten what they did. No-one can have looked at those cages and failed to realise that something had gone terrible, terribly wrong.

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