to feel sad at this mum's behaviour at parents evening?

[spookyskeleton]

Have just been to parents evening and everyone sits in the hall looking at their DC's work whilst waiting to see the teacher.

Was sat opposite a mum who had her daughter with her and as she was looking through all her workbooks, all I heard was 'oh, you haven't done that right', 'you got that wrong', 'why have you done that', 'you should be working above a level 2a now', and so on and so on. Not one word of praise in the 15 minutes that we were sat there

I felt so sorry for the girl - who to be fair, just kept shrugging it off and at one point tried to argue that the way she had done it was the way the teacher had told them to do it at which point, the mum said 'well I'll show you an easier way of working that out'.

Just very sad - and before anyone says anything, yes I know it is none of my business etc etc

[SapphireMoon]

I too would judge with a private cats bum face....
Poor child.

[spookyskeleton]

Oh yes, my judging was done in private

[ladydepp]

I am not in favour of over praising children but that seems ridiculous. Poor girl, hope her Dad is a bit less critical!

[SantasLittleMonkeyButler]

YANBU. I'm sure there was something in the workbook worthy of a little praise .

[Sparklingbrook]

I would be judgy as well. Did she have a good look at everyone elses books too-that gives me the rage.

is the Mum a teacher herself?

[spookyskeleton]

No, to be fair, she didn't look at anyone else's books otherwise I think my face would have looked like this and I wouldn't have been able to hide it.

No, mum not a teacher.

[Sparklingbrook]

I was at a Secondary school parents evening. not eavesdropping but we were sat very close to the teachers, waiting our turn, couldn't help but overhear..
One lad was sat with his Mum and Nan while they told his teacher what a lazy arse he was and he could do better. The teacher started defending him.

[OneStepForwardTwoBack]

yanbu I had the exact same experience this week but it was both parents. I don't really know their child but pretty sure they are one of the brighter ones too. It shocked me. One of my kids has SN and I am over the moon at the slightest bit of progress, I can't imagine being so critical of a child that is doing so well.

[JohnnyBarthes]

If it wasn't for the fact his grandmas have never been to parents evening I'd wonder if that was us, Sparkly

[BillyNotQuiteNoMates]

I would have had to have a quiet word with the teacher tbh. It might be none of my business, but that attitude is not going to help the child and sometimes teachers don't know what is going on behind closed doors. (not suggesting that the teacher should have been asked anything or have volunteered any information or their opinion)

[Sparklingbrook]

Johnny. YY Grandmothers at parents' evening-probably not a great idea.

[spookyskeleton]

I am not sure I would have spoken to the teacher as it is none of my business plus it was a different class so couldn't even if I wanted to.

[Aeroflotgirl]

Yanbu how sad poor girl

[NewtRipley]

YANBU

Some kids have a lot to put up with.

[lazyhound444]

I've had parents say to me in front of their children at Parent's Night "We know she's a little bitch". This was about one of the kindest, most able children I currently had in the class. Some of the horrors would make you weep.

[NewtRipley]

Billy

IME, teachers get a pretty good feel for the parenting styles of the parents. Hard when you can do little about it.

[MoominMammasHandbag]

I am with Jonny, I have told teachers that DS was a lazy arse. He was the ultimate cruiser. Not all teachers realised he was only working at half power most of the time.

[bodybooboo]

some kids are just not going to be good enough ever for their parents.

some parents love and esteem is dependant on how their children make them look.

I have an acquaintance who to this day feels her dd failed her grammar school entrance exam just to spite her.

stupid sad idiot.

[bodybooboo]

Lazyhound words fail you. dreadful.

[Scholes34]

Moomin I think we might share the same child!

[NewtRipley]

Moomin

Me too.

But I bet you aren't relentlessly negative to his face ...

[propertyNIGHTmareBEFOREXMAS]

I wouldn't judge to be honest. You don't know the background. Kid could be lazy as shit and might use her homework workbook to wipe her arse with.

[NewtRipley]

But a Primary age child is like a Secondary age child.

[lazyhound444]

bodybooboo. It can be terribly depressing. I had a very able child who had a problem with toilet accidents. Her father quite blithely told me that I was to inform him every time it happened as in future she would "get a good beating".

Another Mother banged on constantly about how marvelous her older DS was and how disappointed she was in the younger one, essentially for being a different person.

If I could take these kids off them there and then I would, but sadly no dice.

[MoominMammasHandbag]

I think you can nag them a bit about stuff they have the power to change. So not basic ability. But effort definitely.
Mind you, I should've saved my breath; it never did that much good.