DH and I are about to have dc3. We were both Irish but have lived in UK for 12 years, both have only worked here.
Increasingly we are wondering about moving back. DH' s industry has picked up and I have good contacts in Ireland to establish private work ad hoc to supplement income.
However the only jobs Dh will get will be in Dublin. The rents alone are eye-watering in areas and buying really unlikely. Childcare seems incredibly expensive.
We have some equity in our home here, say 50k, but I don't want to see ity wasted on rent. We've been used to a piddling mortgage of only 550 a month and have paid off quite a bit just with that. I just can't imagine shelling out a grand in rent for a very modest home with no garden that is effectively just money thrown away...
I could take the kids and live with my family for a year or so with Dh being with us at the weekend. My mother has suggested this. My stepdad also rents rooms in Dublin for professionals doing just this and would give one to Dh at cost e.g. just utilities. I worked out that in 18 months with equity, savings and putting away rent money saved we would have close to 100k which would be a game changer in terms of what we could afford in Dublin. I only want a simple 3 bed semi d with a bit of garden, not looking for a luxury home but so hard to find and schools are a nightmare as ds1 due to start next Sept but in Dublin most apparently signed up to at birth, different system to here.
It just seems awful to split up our little family. I like life here but I do miss both our families desperately and our parents have had health scares etc and we can't afford to travel any more... we miss all family christenings, birthdays, retirements, funerals. I had to miss a very important family funeral recently as only last-minute flight available was £900!!! In all honesty if it was like it was ten years ago and we could get home for a reasonable amount 4-6 times a year and last minute in emergencies we would not be considering leaving.
But... but.... I've been looking through archives and many say it is desperately hard on all parties. It's the kids and the marriage that worry me mostly.
He has a few interviews lined up but I am so unsure...
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
Would we be mad to live apart M to F to save for future security?
17 replies
working9while5 · 24/10/2013 13:00
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.