I've namechanged as this will probably identify me to people I know in RL...
I generally try to go through life with as little conflict as possible, and I try to get on with people. I think I'm a reasonably likeable person, and generally I do get on with people. I have made a special effort at the school gates to get on with the other mums, but also not to get too involved with anyone, in order to make the school pick up and drop off as easy and as hassle free as possible, and also for the benefit of my DCs. I've seen mums fall out before at the school and then not allowing their children to be friends, and it just isn't the sort of thing I'd want to be involved in.
Anyway, I made the mistake of becoming friends with the mum of my youngest child's best friend. DS is in year 1. I met up with her a few times, with the boys, and during that time she told me about how she'd recently fallen out with a big group of friends, and how they'd all turned on her. She seemed nice enough, and I felt bad that they'd treated her so badly.
However, fast forward a few months, and it seems that she's suddenly decided to fall out with me, too, for no apparent reason. We met up a couple of times during the holidays with the boys, and got on fine. I couldn't meet up each time she suggested it as I work part time and she doesn't work.
On the first day of term she ignored me at pick up, whereas last year she always came over and stood with me. Which was fine, it didn't bother me either way, and I just assumed she hadn't seen me or was chatting to others. She did this again the next day and then I walked past her as I went to leave the school grounds and said hello to her and she just snapped 'hello' back at me. And since then each time I speak to her she just glares at me and seems to be making a big deal out of ignoring me. This week she has started bringing people on the school run with her; her mum, her next door neighbour, her niece, and making a point of talking to them and looking at me constantly. Her mum, whom I've met a few times and got on well with, has also ignored me. Her next door neighbour was with her today and looked at me and said 'What, her?' whilst pointing at me.
I genuinely haven't a clue what I've done, and tbh I really can't be arsed to ask her, as she wasn't a good friend in the first place, it's just that I don't want the conflict in front of other people, and I don't want the hassle at the school. I also don't want it getting around that she and I 'don't get on' and then people thinking that I would get involved in petty, spiteful behaviour.
I think she is the type of person who likes a bit of conflict and likes to stir up a bit of trouble, and it's clearly my 'turn' at the moment to be on the receiving end, but it's just so annoying. She is quite mouthy and loud and I dread her making a scene!
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AIBU?
To ask how you deal with it when someone is determined to fall out with you no matter what?
11 replies
ChangerofNamer · 27/09/2013 17:33
OP posts:
OldBagWantsNewBag ·
27/09/2013 18:13
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