To not want to go to baby groups?

(57 Posts)
AlisonL1981 Mon 23-Sep-13 23:26:43

I'm very new to the area I'm currently living in. I'm very shy and self conscious and don't like meeting new people.

I'm currently feeling guilty that my 6 month old ds is not interacting with and other children. (Shouldnt have watched doc Martin this evening)

Should I go for ds's sake? What type of groups would be best for a 6mo or us it better to wait until he's a bit older.

I haven't seen much in the way if patent and baby activities locally anyway.

bigbrick Tue 24-Sep-13 09:54:28

These groups vary so much. I didn't enjoy my local one and instead did other things that I would normally do - the supermarket, daily things to do, the garden to explore, just doing what we wanted

AlisonL1981 Tue 24-Sep-13 18:50:33

I'm from North Ayrshire. I did a quick internet search but not much came up. I will ask the hv although she's not overly helpful. Always seems to be pushing us put of the door when we go!
I know there is a small library in the nearest village. The nearest 'leisure centre' is quite run down so I'm not sure what the swimming pool is like.
I may have to look further afield.

I feel better hearing your stories and that ds doesn't 'need' lots of interaction from others.

I hate the idea of a room of rough toddlers and clicky mums. I can take my time and have a look for something good to do, like a lot of you have said, it's jury as much for my sake as ds. My dp's mum is local, as well as his aunt and uncle. Other than that, my nearest friends are 400 miles south sad

MinesAPintOfTea Tue 24-Sep-13 20:05:08

I think (although not Scottish so things are called by different names down here) you might want to go to bookbug. It seems to be at lots of N. Ayrshire libraries obviously don't know if its at yours. Might be worth a try if there's one local (word doc linked at bottom of page has locations and times).

itsn0tmeitsyou Tue 24-Sep-13 20:16:16

Haven't read all the thread so sorry if I'm repeating what's been said, but I think it depends on what you want for yourself. You say you don't like meeting new people, but does that mean you don't want to, or just don't enjoy the process?

Your baby will be fine not socialising for quite a while. I hated unstructured mum and baby groups too, either because all the mums seemed to already know each other, or because I'm just crap at random small talk. So I went to something called Gymboree, which was very structured, a person lead the group in singing and physical activities, and it was absolutely not noted whether you talked to the other mums or were just there for your baby/toddler to enjoy it.

So if you want something for you and your baby to do, go to something structured. If you do want to meet people for you, I would choose something you are interested in, even do it in the evenings (like evening classes etc), as that way you would meet people you have more in common with than just having a baby the same age.

i think the key is finding one you like.

i've never found one i like tbh but i do live in london. very unfriendly ime, and people tend to go with friends so not much friendly chat going on.

i haven't taken my third to any. don't feel guilty either!

i think it's more for the parents than the kids. the kids ignore each other except to fight over toys anyway.

peanutbuttersarnies Tue 24-Sep-13 20:21:46

I would recommend a class that has structure and a leader. Like a baby signing class. Rather than the ones where you sit around feeling a bit awkward and not sure who to talk to. I always found tjose much more welcoming.

But only cos its great for you to get out to a few things. Not vos your baby needs them.

meganorks Tue 24-Sep-13 20:34:23

Sounds like it would be good for you, but I wouldn't feel too bad you are depriving baby. They are definitely more for the mums and I don't think the kids really care. And they don't really integrate until they are 18 months or more really. Tend to just ignore each other.

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