OK, briefly, DD is coming up to 9 months old. She has been an absolute angel on the whole, yes she has her moments but they all do, generally speaking she is calm, delightful, sweet, sunny, funny and I adore her, she has even (thus far, crosses fingers) slept (bar the odd blip) beautifully since she quietly stopped night feeding at about four months old. I AM RUINED, and I know it, really I do.
Now, everyone around me is broody as heck and I'm just not. I adore my girl, I love every second with her but I'm just not chomping at the bit to do it all again! Any child even if I conceived tomorrow would be born when I'm over 40 so the clock is ticking but I just can't seem to want to go for it. DD was prem and given that she took a while to come along I don't want to overshadow her toddler years in pursuit of a sibling and then if we did have another fear having another premie or a very stressful and not so calm baby and end up being frazzled with them both. I also feel that with one there is much that we could afford to do in terms of activities and hobbies etc that we took for granted as kids that now seem to cost proportionately more and therefore might not be on the cards for two. Might seem an odd thing to say but if like her to have the chance to do things I loved as a child. I also was never close to my brother so don't buy the whole it's nice to have a sibling line, there are cousins, family and lots of friends, I'm happy to put the effort in to making sure she has as much social life and activities as she wants.
DH has been away since DD was 4 months and it could so easily happen again, we've been fine this time but would worry on a second round! I can see a lovely future with the three of us and coping just fine when I'm inevitably left fort holding but equally don't want to get three years down the line and wish we had tried while there was still a vague chance!
So, anyone felt like this? Am I being unreasonably chicken here? Did anyone have a second an wonder what on earth they worried about or has anyone stopped at one and never looked back?
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To Not Be Sure About Having A Second Child?
49 replies
JRsandCoffee · 30/07/2013 14:08
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