Long story but i don't want to drip feed.
DGF (who is now dead) had a "secret family". He was married and had a teenage boy going to war. When he came back he didn't go back to them instead he pretended to be single and started a relationship with my DGM (she was 18, he was 36). eventually he got a divorce and married my DGM but the son and ex wife were swept under the carpet (when she died he wouldn't take son in, or admit his existence).
Anyway one of the son's children made contact with my gran (he was researching his family tree) and they have been talking. A meet up barbecue was arranged at DM's house.
So we are all getting to know each other, and he makes a few sexist (IMO) remarks but we just ignore them. My aunt then starts talking about her holiday in Amsterdam, saying that she felt a bit of a fool when someone had to tell her that the ladies in the windows were prostitutes. she said "well i saw a couple of pretty girls dancing in their bedrooms in bikinis and thought why do they not close the curtains?". At this point new half cousin (man in his 60's) turn round to my sister (early 30s and not very good english) "would you not consider a change of career then?". I was and rather mortified that he said this in front of my gran, his wife, etc...
The next morning at breakfast, my aunty asked if anyone else had felt uncomfortable. I said that yes, i'd heard a few things that i thought were beyond the pale. My DP and Uncle agreed with us.
Yesterday i get a phone call from mum saying what did you think of new family member and i heard that aunty said she heard some things. I said i also heard and recanted verbatim the exchanges. She said "well he was only joking!" in a YABDU tone.
Am i being to sensitive? is it acceptable banter? or is he in fact a bit of a twat?
(note he was driving his bike back so wasn't drinking)
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Please
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AIBU?
or do i need to get a grip/ sense of humour?
39 replies
qazxc · 28/07/2013 14:55
OP posts:
miemohrs ·
28/07/2013 15:29
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Message withdrawn at poster's request.
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