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To think some are so bloody mean about their parents?

(107 Posts)
Tittypulumpcious Wed 17-Jul-13 18:43:08

Not all parents are amazing, but they are all human! I am not talking about those who abuse their kids in many ways. I mean the run of the mill 'normal' parent who does what they feel is the best for their kids bring them up they in turn become adults their parents get older and then they slate their parents for talking too much, repeating themselves, being particular about things the list goes on.

Maybe I am sensitive because my mum has been ill for almost 10 years and I have missed out on so many mother daughter things, she might be my mum but she's a person first with her own issues and foibles.

I saw a woman today laughing with her friends because her mum was on the phone clearly boring her so she put her phone on the table until she thought she might have finished.

I'm sure everyone has a reason for doing/saying whatever but my guess is when their parent is no longer here those things that irritated them might be some of the things they miss. Just pisses me off when I see someone disrespecting someone they say they love in this way.

Rant over!

Jubelteen Thu 18-Jul-13 23:44:48

Oh dear OP, you're getting a bit of a bashing when you made it quite clear that you weren't talking about abusive parents. I agree with you, it's disrespectful to mock your elderly parents. My DM lives alone, I live a long distance away, so contact is mainly by phone. I might be the only person she had spoken to that day, and she tells me all her 'news', what she ate that day, what she enjoyed on TV etc in minute detail. It makes me sad that she is often lonely. I wouldn't dream of moaning about her. She wasn't always a perfect Mum but did her best.
Also sad that so many people here are so damaged by their experiences with abusive/toxic parents. OP didn't intend to light an 'emotional fuse' as suggested.

grumpyoldbat Fri 19-Jul-13 00:15:09

I think people are trying to point out that the OP has no way of knowing if the Mum in question was abusive.

AaDB Fri 19-Jul-13 12:44:24

I wasn't abused and I'm sure a lot of people wouldn't want to label themselves that way. We were neglected at times. Our parents can't expect to have a Disney relationship now; they didn't put the foundation work in.

Jubelteen Fri 19-Jul-13 14:01:25

AaDB but don't you think most people were a bit neglected at times? I can think of loads of things my parents did that would probably be classed as neglect these days, and I've not been a model Mum myself 100% of the time. I don't think there's any such thing as a Disney relationship, unless it's fake, e.g. perfect families on FB. It's not nice to mock your parents, if they merit having a relationship with, it should be civil.

flippinada Fri 19-Jul-13 15:01:02

Not being a "model mum" (who thinks of themselves like that anyway?) is a long way away from being neglectful. There's a whole spectrum of behaviour inbetween.

SarahStrattonIsBackForJustABit Fri 19-Jul-13 15:56:57

Plus, the neglect/abuse/etc is really obvious when it's only aimed at one child in the family. The scapegoat/golden child scenario is hideously damaging.

grumpyoldbat Fri 19-Jul-13 17:03:55

jubel more than one person has explained why some people continue to have some sort of relationship with parents who don't really deserve it. Do you really think all of the bad parents described on here deserve to be treated with utmost respect?

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