to be dreading the school summer holidays? they make me feel lonely :(

(62 Posts)
dirtyface Thu 11-Jul-13 20:28:57

my dcs are 4 and 7

i always feel like everyone else will be having loads of fun days out and meet ups and generally hanging out with their friends and their friends dcs

we haven't really got anyone like that, and dh works FT so its just going to be the 3 of us most days (i work 1 - 2 days a week)

i always thought before i had kids that when i had them i would automatically meet loads of other mums and have this amazing social life, but it just has never happened for me

VitoCorleone Sat 13-Jul-13 12:31:52

Where abouts are you OP? Im the same in the holidays, DP works ft in shifts so im always alone.

Im in the Lake District

dirtyface Sat 13-Jul-13 12:33:36

Be proactive - I had a few 'friends' on FB who have kids approx same age so I set up an event and invited them all to meet at the park , about 6/7 showed up and it was lovely

wow thats fantastic bea envy what a good idea

i would be so worried no one would come if i did that .... can you tell i am quite scared of rejection?? would rather be on my own than risk people turning me down for stuff grin

Maryz Sat 13-Jul-13 12:39:26

But would it matter if no-one turned up? If one person comes, your kids have someone to play with. If no-one turns up, no-one will know.

ThreeMusketeers Sat 13-Jul-13 13:21:44

I am dreading the end of Summer holidays. I really love being with little Musketeers and couldn't be arsed to socialise with generally dull and needy people.
Don't get me wrong, I do have a few unbelievably great friends however, they are too far and acquaintances, amusing as they might be, are just too much work and hassle.
I used to love giving garden parties in the Summer but that was BC.
Now, my fun are my children grin

apatchylass Sat 13-Jul-13 19:48:02

I'm with Three Musketeers on that one. I occasionally fix to meet up with others for DCs sake but am happier on my own with DC. We/re very in tune with each other and get on well together. We all like the same stuff. Endlessly having to sort out food and toilet stops for other children and having to listen to their meltdowns, or talk to another adult when DC are interrupting/charging towards the park lake etc is too stressful, I'd rather focus on them when I'm with them and adults when I'm out with the grown ups.

dirtyface Sat 13-Jul-13 19:50:05

hmm but on FB maryz if i invite a load of friends to something and no one (or hardly anyone) accepts, everyone i have invited will be able to see !

might give it a try though

and 3musketeers, thats absolutely lovely smile perhaps i should try and think more like that.

blackbirdatglanmore Sat 13-Jul-13 19:51:05

Have you got any friends without children? Some are probably quite lonely too.

QueenOfIndecision Sat 13-Jul-13 19:55:21

op, i know exactly how you feel. my DCs are 4 and 7 too. Are you in yorkshire dirtyface?

dirtyface Sat 13-Jul-13 20:42:00

yes i have a couple of child-free friends blackbird but they both work FT. so when we meet, i tend to see them in the evenings, ie will go for a drink or something. and they are brill, lovely friends and i value them loads, but i just wish i had more <hated on mn word alert> <whispers> "mummy friends"

and no, am not in yorkshire sadly queenof

Notcontent Sat 13-Jul-13 22:59:21

Just wanted to say you are not alone.
I am not a hermit and also have some friends but generally dd and I don't really have that many people to do stuff with. Like this weekend, it's just the two of.

I have also tried making "mummy friends" but they generally fizzle out after a while.

M0naLisa Sat 13-Jul-13 23:01:44

I shall be taking mine to the local soft play (gulp) but its what they like.
Although DS1 & DS2 are going on holiday next saturday with my dad and stepmum for 2 weeks and arent back home until 5th August so it will be quiet at home with just me and DS3. DH will be working 2-10 shift 5 out of 7 so the days he at work will be just me and DS3 who is 7.5mths and teething sad But hes still happy.
I will be meeting up with friends from school in the holidays to go to the park or for coffee and for the kids to play. But i will feel lonely the days i am in on my own with the kids as my routine of school and coffee with ffriends will be out the window for 6 weeks!

BeaWheesht Sat 13-Jul-13 23:25:47

But in my experience people WILL come because as you can see from this thread lots of people feel the same and anyways who cares?! You've got to let go of the fear, it's really limiting your experiences.

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