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AIBU?

To not know if IABU?

14 replies

MrsSparkles · 03/07/2013 09:36

One for the mumsnet jury.

We have recently moved house, currently DD is still at her previous nursery - which is around a 1 hour drive away (each way). I have to drive it for work anyway so that's not a problem.

The pro's are its a wonderful nursery, amazing grounds and she's really well settled plus my mum is nearby if I get held up at work.

However it means around 2 hours in the car each day for her (3 days a week), so I was thinking of moving her to a nursery closer. Its part of the same group so same ethos etc, but the grounds are nowhere near as nice and she does love being outside.

DH thinks I am being unreasonable and selfish in wanting to move her from a place she's happy, but I can't get away from the fact that 2 hours in the car each day is such a long time.

All thoughts are welcome!

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Cherriesarelovely · 03/07/2013 09:43

So do you take your Dd to nursery which is near where you work? I can understand why this is a good situation in that way plus the fact that she is near your mum. Even though I can understand wanting to move her how would you manage if you were held up at work and she was effectively an hour away from you?

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MorphandChas · 03/07/2013 09:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cherriesarelovely · 03/07/2013 09:45

Agree with the quality time in the car thing. I think my Dd would love this even now, she is 10!

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fanjobiscuits · 03/07/2013 09:45

Depends - is he going to drive her?

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Twitterqueen · 03/07/2013 09:47

Does she like the journey? Or does she play up and make it stressful you? I would expect she probably sleeps on the way back, which might make evenings trickier...

I think your DH is being harsh in calling you unreasonable and selfish - how does that work? Don't get it.

What matters is what works best for you and for your DD. I also don't get how it benefit you if you moved her.

If she's OK with the status quo I would maintain it! But it's your decision.

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OccamsRaiser · 03/07/2013 11:17

I assume her current nursery is near your work, if you're doing the drive already? If so, think about what would happen if you switched nursery and she was ill or injured. Do you have someone 'local' who would pick her up? Would she just want Mum (apologies for any implied sexism, but I know when my DS is unwell, he only wants Mum!) Just another consideration...

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ChippingInWiredOnCoffee · 03/07/2013 11:20

There are too many unknown details really, but one thing is for sure, your DH is being a prat.

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wouldliketobethere · 03/07/2013 12:23

How old is she? Would she be there long? If she is likely to meet new local friends before moving up to school then that is a factor to bear in mind but maybe if she is still very young that decision could wait for a while.

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SalaciousBCrumb · 03/07/2013 12:31

Could you do the same hours at work if you were tied by needing to do drop off and pick ups according to a nursery's opening times an hour away?

For what it's worth my children have been at a local nursery andyet DD knew one child when she started at our local school, and DS will not know a soul, so I wouldn't worry about the local friendship thing too much as may not work out that way anyway.

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ShabbyButNotChic · 03/07/2013 12:39

I would leave her if she is happy, it is a massive bonus to have you childs nursery close to your work. What would happen if you got a call she was ill etc? Better for her to be close to you then chat in the car, than you be clock watching and rushing trying to get to a nursery far from work.

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SkinnybitchWannabe · 03/07/2013 12:44

If it was my situation I would move her closer so she can be settled in friendships before starting infant school.
Also so the journey to collect her in an emergency (if she becomes poorly etc) is less.

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SkinnybitchWannabe · 03/07/2013 12:46

Sorry Ive just realised that the nursery is near to your job.
So ignore the last sentence of my post Blush

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MrsSparkles · 03/07/2013 18:35

Great - thank you for all the comments Smile. She's quite happy in the car (so far!) we chat and sing, and play games. Glad no-ones come back and said its terrible for her to be in the car so long.

I'm self employed so luckily my hours are totally flexible. So I think for the moment I'll leave her where she is, and just tweak her days so that she doesn't do 2 long days in a row!

DH commutes in the other direction so I do all the nursery stuff (with the odd bit of help from my mum).

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MrsSparkles · 03/07/2013 18:36

I will revisit in September/October when the days are shorter and it may not be so much fun!

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