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AIBU?

to not go to a family party..

23 replies

ditsydoll · 26/05/2013 21:41

Because a few of the children there have chicken pox..
I'm due this week.. Dc1 hasn't had chickenpox yet so could easily catch it and pass it to dc2 when born in the first few weeks of his/her life.

How is chickenpox passed? Could Dh still goand not pass it to us because he's already had it or could he carry it?

OP posts:

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cathpip · 26/05/2013 21:46

It's highly unlikely that dc2 will get chicken pox as he will have your immunity, however dc1 will most likely catch it and its a 2week ish incubation before spots appear and quite frankly you could be doing without an ill irritable itchy toddler with a newborn. I do believe that if your dh has had chicken pox he cannot pass it to you or dc1.

blondefriend · 26/05/2013 21:47

I definitely wouldn't go. Or let dc1 go. I expect it's ok for OH to go but not 100% sure.

ditsydoll · 26/05/2013 21:50

Do you think I should ask family members to stay away seeing as all their children will have mixed at the party also? I don't know how it's spread really but could a child be incubating it and pass it on to dc1 and newborn?

OP posts:

raisah · 26/05/2013 21:53

Dont go, its really iresponsible of the parents to take the kids to a party where a pregnant woman & possibly other ill people could be there. I was in a similar situation to yours but didnt know that there kids with chicken pox until I got there. I was 26 weeks pregnant at the time & gave birth 2 days later. He survived but it was a long road. Dont go its not worth it.

ditsydoll · 26/05/2013 21:56

No it's really not worth it you're right. I'll be giving it a miss..

OP posts:

myonlyfriend · 26/05/2013 21:59

No way I would go, in fact I think the children who have chickenpox and are contagious should be the ones not to go. My dc's are much older but they both recently had cp, dd was really poorly.
We stayed in whilst they were spotty and contagious, yes it was a pain in the arse but much better than someone who has lowered immunity etc to catch it. Some of the children in ds's school are so poorly and vunerable it could kill them. So, no yanbu in the slightest.

cathpip · 26/05/2013 22:04

Chicken pox are infectious for about 48hrs before the spots appear and then until the spots have scabbed over. My ds had mild cp and spots scabbed at about 5 days, dd had bad cp and spots got infected and it took 12 days for spots to scab over. It's normally close contact with an infected child, my ds who caught cp first spent 1hr sat next to a friend who then erupted in spots the next day, luckily mum told me ASAP so I could keep an eye out. You would be more at risk than a newborn, I would definitely give it a miss.

raisah · 26/05/2013 22:05

I am glad you are not going. Best to ask the hosts to mention it to other guests so they have an option to attend. If someone recovering from chemo attended it could cause them serious problems. The host should ask the chicken pox family not to attend unless they were their own kids. Just stupid to take pox ridden kids to a party.

cantbloodywellchoose · 26/05/2013 22:10

No, YANBU. The parents sending their spotty kids to a party with a heavily pg woman and kids who haven't had the pox ABU.

RenterNomad · 26/05/2013 22:31

We stayed away from a longed-for party today because DS hadn't fully scabbed up (and DD is probably incubating it).

I suppose your lot are thinking "it's all in the family, but given that you are different households, they can and should spare others!

flanbase · 26/05/2013 22:37

yanbu and better to stay home. Why are the others taking their sick kids as chicken pox can be very dangerous to others with reduced immunity, newborns (if your dc1 got it)

SquinkiesRule · 27/05/2013 04:01

Don't go, if you catch it and deliver late and baby has it too, the baby can be pretty sick from it. I wouldn't take the chance.
My oldest got it when his new brother was 4 weeks old and the baby and I were fine. We didn't catch it.

AmericasTorturedBrow · 27/05/2013 06:11

I wouldn't go - I missed SIL'a wedding because her daughter had it and I was due the day of the wedding, read up that it's dangerous for women in first 12 and last 2 weeks of pregnancy to be near those who are contagious

Groovee · 27/05/2013 07:18

I wouldn't go. 2 friends have come home from hospital with the new baby and the older one has come out with chickenpox days later. 2 weeks later despite being breast fed the baby has come out with chickenpox

Flicktheswitch · 27/05/2013 07:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Dinosaurdrip · 27/05/2013 07:49

Both DS's (4 & 3) got cp one after the other and d despite dd (3 weeks) being breastfed and everyone telling me she would be have my immunity she got it too. It was not a haapy time in our household, 2 cranky, itchy boys and a newborn all with cp.

SoldeInvierno · 27/05/2013 07:51

I would not use the vaccination. My son had it when he was 2, as it was the norm in my country. He never had CP, but age 9 he got shingles. I was told it was a consequence of not having had Cp. So I would not go to the party but i would let toddlers and older get the illness

lljkk · 27/05/2013 08:19

Normally I'm in the camp of exposing DC to get it over with but even I wouldn't deliberately risk a baby under 2 months getting it.

Only question is how contagious are the children at the party, if their spots came out more than 5 days ago they have nearly nil chance of being contagious now. I only say that because lots of people think CP is contagious for up to 2 weeks after the spots came out.

Flicktheswitch · 27/05/2013 17:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BlackAffronted · 27/05/2013 17:36

My friends fully-breastfed 6 week old caught CP, so do not rely on your immunity.

drinkyourmilk · 27/05/2013 17:46

I nanny for a child with an immune system deficiency and had the chicken pox talk with his consultant a couple of weeks ago.
Someone is contagious until the last spot has crusted over. Don't forget you can have two or three waves of spots .
If your dh has had chickenpox then he will be a barrier and will not pass it on to you or your son.

Tailtwister · 27/05/2013 17:51

YANBU, I wouldn't go.

DS2 caught chicken pox at around 4 weeks, despite me being immune and him being exclusively breastfed. Not worth the risk imo.

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IneedAsockamnesty · 27/05/2013 17:51

I'm quite shocked that in this day and age people would take kids with cp to a party.

If they are stupid enough to do so then they quite obviously don't much care about anyone more vulnerable as you are at the moment. So no I wouldn't go.

If you get cp whilst pregnant ( or within about 7 days of giving birth) and if you go into labor due to this ( or because its term) your at risk of passing a very serious form of cp onto your baby and it can be fatal.

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