To be a bit pissed off with friend? Or does she have a point?

(51 Posts)
VelvetSpoon Sun 26-May-13 12:38:23

Said friend has form for being a bit blunt. The sort of person who would tell you that you looked fat in an outfit (while other people might dress it up as 'it's not that flattering' kind of thing). So, you get an idea what she's like.

Was talking to her today about a man I've been seeing for a while, and that he wasn't ready to get into anything serious, etc, and she said 'that's probably because of what a state your house is'

to which I was shock, slightly thought she was joking but knowing her, thought she might well be being genuine and she carried on to say she couldn't see any man getting involved with me long term, because they wouldn't be able to live in my house as it is, and no-one would want to do the amount of work that's needed to someone else's house.

My house is a state (unfinished DIY project) but I didn't think it was that bad. (I also don't at all think it's a factor with this particular man but that's perhaps rather by the by) However I am a bit worried maybe I have lived with it so long I have no concept of what is normal. And one of my Ex's big things that he always put me down about was the state of the house and garden...so am left feeling a bit uncertain now really.

Cosmosim Mon 27-May-13 10:13:38

It seems your friend is bluntly echoing what you've told her other dates said about your house in the past. It would put me off to date someone with a house like yours - I would want to muck in and help finish it and it would definitely be an indication of mismatched personalities that the other person could live in diy limbo for years.

Interestingly, I was looking at buying my first flat while dating. Got one that needed lots of decorating DIY that I had planned to do myself. The man I started dating about then looked completely relieved once he realised I didn't want him to come over to "help" out on weekends as he hated DIY. Married him in the end and guess what we argue about a lot - DIY :-)

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