To not want to spend £30+ on wedding? How much did you spend and where?

(232 Posts)
orangeclock Fri 26-Apr-13 16:56:26

My partner and I have 2 children and are approaching 10 years together. We haven't married yet because we just haven't got around to it. We feel married already but think it would be wise to make things legal. We'd like to get married next year with about 150-200 guests, and we want to do something fairly lovely in a beautiful venue with a sit down meal.

Can I ask where you got married, how many guests, and how much did you spend?

I have looked at a couple of lovely venues but they cost out at £30,000 plus with the catering! We just don't want to spend such a huge chunk of money.

£20,000 would probably be our limit and I still think that's a small fortune.

We can't escape the sit down meal - older family would expect it. I also would like a really lovely venue and a good photographer.

We're happy to skimp on cake, cars, honeymoon, simple decorations, getting married off season and maybe mid week. Also starting later in the day so it's not an all day celebration.

I would really appreciate hearing your wedding experiences and any tips for not spending an absolute fortune! Thank you.

Groovee Fri 26-Apr-13 16:57:43

Mine was £6K but it was 15 years ago. Full sit down meal and a good day. Though if I did it again or was to go back... I'd disappear with my gran and 2 friends and do it without my dad's family there.

SantanaLopez Fri 26-Apr-13 16:57:50

Ha, I thought you meant just £30 grin

Groovee Fri 26-Apr-13 16:58:03

oh and we had 100 during the day and 220 at night.

expatinscotland Fri 26-Apr-13 16:58:16

Why not get married at a registry office, then have a knees up in a pub or Brewer's Fayre type place afterwards?

wonderingsoul Fri 26-Apr-13 16:59:32

do a registary office and book a reasurant. (even if you have to book the whole place..which i think would be wuite nice to really) would be far cheap imagine

justmuddlingalong Fri 26-Apr-13 17:00:06

Registry office, 12 guests, about £1200 all in. Fantastic day.

I was going to suggest registry office then taking over a restaurant. You'll be able to negotiate a fixed price set menu with a few choices and it will be a lot cheaper not being subjected to the wedding tax!

IloveJudgeJudy Fri 26-Apr-13 17:00:26

We got married over 20 years ago. Can't remember exactly how much we paid, but we did have it at a lovely venue - a village hall in beautiful surroundings. We paid a caterer and bought our own drink.

Perhaps you could find somewhere like that instead of paying an absolute fortune to a venue just for the hire?

Cross posted wonderingsoul - great minds!

Tailtwister Fri 26-Apr-13 17:01:05

The very best wedding I've ever been to was one I suspect was quite low budget. The ceremony was a civil one and took place in a lovely hall in a school and the reception was in the local church hall. Friends and family came a day early and helped do all the decoration. Caterers were brought in and we ate at trestle tables. It was lovely to be included in the preparations (a real privilege actually) and knocked spots off all the big traditional weddings I've been to.

SantanaLopez Fri 26-Apr-13 17:01:07

Are there any church halls about you? My friends hired one with a lovely little garden for photos and then for wee ones to run about in, and then all they had to sort was catering. It wasn't a stately home, but it was clean and cheap. Plus take strategically placed pictures and no one knows any better!

cornyderpy Fri 26-Apr-13 17:02:26

3k
hired a wedding dress
family member made bridesmaids dresses
family member made cake
friend drove us
got cheap as chips photographer (who actually looks at their wedding photos?)
dh hired morning suits from somewhere cheap like greenwoods
went to local 1970's hotel and had sit down meal and cheesy disco -

everyone said it was great

Tailtwister Fri 26-Apr-13 17:05:03

Forgot to say that lots of people contributed things for the wedding. The bride made her own dress, a relative made the cake, a friend took the photos (plus we all sent in the ones we had taken and there were a few very good ones). It was personal and lovely and really showed how much the couple were loved. Very emotional (wipes away a tear).

orangeclock Fri 26-Apr-13 17:05:33

Sorry the title should say £30k plus not £30!

Thank you for all the suggestions so far. I do want somewhere very lovely and elegant as a venue so happy to spend a bit. Just not to extremes!

AlnwickRose Fri 26-Apr-13 17:06:44

10 years ago. About 3k. 15 people.

orangeclock Fri 26-Apr-13 17:06:53

Would love to hear about actual names of lovely inexpensive venues too please! We live in London but happy to wed in town or country.

ipswitch Fri 26-Apr-13 17:07:12

Dont spend a fortune, its crazy IMO.

20 years ago married DH, local registry office, party back at our flat , caterers for amazing food and drink. Best day ever. Total spend £1000 including new dress and suit that he still wears ( mine does not fit and would look a bit stupid now TBH!!!!). Home made cake, decorations and invites, no photographer, drove ourselves to Reg office and back.

absentmindeddooooodles Fri 26-Apr-13 17:07:50

All the venues I looked at were offering the sit down meal (3 course) for a max of £30 a head including drinks! Saying that, welcome drinks were extra and overnight accommodation was too albeit at a discounted rate. These venues ranged from really nice hotels by the sea, to stately homes and farms! My budget is £5000 and I've managed to get exclusive full weekend use of a beautiful farm, a big hog roast and buffet. For 200 people.Kitted out 6 grooms men in Cornish kilts, 5 bridesmaids, 2 ushers, 3 flowe girls and a page boy. Plus my dress, a band, dj, loads of other entertainment, cake and transport. Also favours invites etc. dear god did it take some looking around, and a lot of home made touches but it really can be done!!!! Where abouts are you? If I'd gone for the sit down meal option for my 200 in Cornwall, a nice venue would have set me back around 7000 all in. I think the wedding overall would have been around 9000. If you play a few people off each other (photographers etc) you can get some really discounted rates! Sorry for rambling, am in total wedding planning mode today haha. I hope you have a lovely lovely day whatever you end up doing.

AThingInYourLife Fri 26-Apr-13 17:09:03

I was thinking this was classic MN - unwilling to part with 30 quid to get married grin

theoriginalandbestrookie Fri 26-Apr-13 17:10:28

Goodness we paid £10k 7 years ago and that was in a posh hotel for around 100 people.

Don't go mid week whatever you do. It's a massive pain for people to get to the wedding and will involve them taking 2-3 days off work.

We went to our friends wedding recently and it was lovely, done on a real budget. They held the reception in a community hall and had a catered hog roast. The DH is a real ale fiend so they bought in some casks and set up a bar. Friends provided desserts ( that the children all made a dash for as they didn't really like the hog roast)

I sense that is not for your, but don't get attached to the having it in an expensive.It will cost an arm and a leg for your guests to stay there and bar drinks will be extortionate.

It is a big day and it's important that you have the right wedding for you, but at the end of the day the main thing is that all your friends and family are together and that you are getting married.

Tailtwister Fri 26-Apr-13 17:10:30

I would say that choose which parts of the wedding are the most important to you and then spend the money there. There are always ways to cut costs and you can do that by calling in favours. You would be amazed the hidden talents your friends and family may have. Someone's bound to have a posh car you can use (wedding cars are extortionate and are used for such a short time) and a bespoke dress is often cheaper than something off the peg!

mrsjay Fri 26-Apr-13 17:10:31

Ha, I thought you meant just £30

so did I I was like what eh thats a bit stingy.

fwiw I think 20k is way over the top for a wedding scale it down imo

theoriginalandbestrookie Fri 26-Apr-13 17:11:38

We could set an MN £30 wedding challenge - see who can find the cheapest wedding dress on E-bay that's wearable !

ipswitch Fri 26-Apr-13 17:11:40

Oh and I lost my amature wedding photos some years ago ??? in a house move, never thought about them for 10+ years so no point getting stressed about loosing them somewhere.

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