To ask if you pay money for good school reports?

(136 Posts)
whokilleddannylatimer Mon 15-Apr-13 13:27:35

Because three other parents have all expressed shock and that IABU that I do not, the children are in primary school, I have never even thought about it to be honest, I just told and expected the dc to try their hardest and praised them when they have.

Its never crossed my mind to pay them for it!

JamieOliveOil Sun 21-Apr-13 12:54:55

We had Parents Evening this week and the feedback for DC was great - their treat was a chinese on Friday night, which they very much appreciated and enjoyed.

hollyisalovelyname Sun 21-Apr-13 12:00:00

Yeah i paid the teacher a thousand pounds. DS still got an E- in Maths.
THIS IS A JOKE by the waygrin

KatyDid02 Fri 19-Apr-13 07:00:52

Well done to your DS Arbitary, I'd have rewarded that too smile

Actually we rewarded DS1 for getting (unexpected) 5s in his Y6 SATs. Not because it mattered or anything but because it did wonders for his confidence (and confidence is an issue) and we wanted to bolster that.

KatyDid02 Thu 18-Apr-13 22:15:14

My DCs get a new book (as they both love reading) if they have got good marks for effort on their school reports. I think that's reasonable, I wouldn't be comfortable with rewarding achievement though as I think effort is what matters.

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Thu 18-Apr-13 22:11:50

Lynette! grin

bedmonster Thu 18-Apr-13 21:46:21

We treat for good reports. Well as they are only 7 and 8, they have always had good reports, so we usually have a fun trip out somewhere as a family, or go out for a meal of their choosing etc. Family time is not exactly rare, but DP works weekdays and saturdays and sometimes sundays too so we like to make the most of it when we can. We just had school reports out and they were both great, and DP gave them both some money to buy themselves a book (they thought this was a fabulous treat as they are both bookworms), and we took them to the seaside for a nice family evening to say a big well done to them. I think they really valued it and felt proud.

LynetteScavo Thu 18-Apr-13 21:42:02

Judging by the grammar of my last post, I didn't get a very good education, though. grin

And my DC don't go to school because they need an education, they go because I need free childcare.

(That was a joke, btw)

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Thu 18-Apr-13 21:33:04

DC go to school because they need an education Lynette...not because you drop them off....of course, if it weren't for you, they'd probably not bother....but that's besides the point.

The point is that you work for money because you've done your time...got an education and DC have not. They must learn work ethics before they learn that hard work begets money.

LynetteScavo Thu 18-Apr-13 20:40:07

No way! If the school can't motivate my DC to try hard, then I'd be looking for another school. (Well, DS1 try's hard for him, but not compared to some really keen girls.)

The academic bit should follow. If they've tried hard, they will do as well as they can. There is no way I'm going to reward DS1 for achieving well academically with not that much effort, when another of my DC will achieve nowhere near his levels at the same age, but will have worked really hard.

I go to work because I need the money...my DC go to school because I drop them off there every morning.

I do reward my DC if they've had a difficult teacher....usually a meal out at the end of the year, to say well done for surviving that! (The teacher is probably in a different restaurant drinking wine and congratulating themselves on surviving a year with my DC grin)

marriedinwhiteagain Thu 18-Apr-13 20:26:50

Indeedy!!!!!

bigTillyMint Thu 18-Apr-13 20:18:30

Can you tell I have one of each?grin

We have never bribed/rewarded DD, but I think it might be something that could work on DS (unless he naturally improves as he gets older) which would then be a whole other can of wormsconfused

marriedinwhiteagain Thu 18-Apr-13 19:47:19

bigtillymint* makes exceptionally good points. Looks at lazy git of a pfb who brought home 10 A*s who has been exceptionally demanding since the day he was born and at dd who will pull down a mixture but who works her cotton socks off and aims, at all times, to please.

valiumredhead Thu 18-Apr-13 15:11:26

Cash is cheaper than a family day out ime wink

acebaby Thu 18-Apr-13 14:12:11

:-) Another who opened the thread thinking that this was about £20 notes stuffed in the reading record book.

My DS's are still young (7 and 4), and I only read the the Headmaster's report with them. I don't generally go for rewards, but I did buy DS1 a new dinosaur book when he was named 'sports player of the week' for scoring a goal in hockey. He finds academic work easy, and doesn't need to try to stay top of the class - but he finds sport very difficult and is very small for his age, so this was a real achievement for him.

And we do go out for a celebratory trip to the toy shop at the end of term, whatever the reports say!

bigTillyMint Thu 18-Apr-13 14:00:16

I think the whole concept of paying for certain results is really difficult. I am not necessarily dead against it, but there are lots of what ifs.

What if they revise hard and try their best but still don't reach their predicted grades? (think English GCSE fiasco)
What if they look like they are revising but are not focusing and then they get poor grades (but what is predicted because they have never put much effort in)?
What if their predicted grades are too low and they get them without much effort?
What to do when there is a big difference in ability and application between siblings?

norfolknic Thu 18-Apr-13 13:34:56

No I wouldn't pay for good school reports.

Education is a privilege. I would consider a nice treat, like a family day out if their choice but never cash. It seems like a bribe and children should realise education has its own rewards.

ratbagcatbag Thu 18-Apr-13 13:28:44

Ill happily report back next year hully, because if the opportunity to earn a car doesn't motivate him I don't know what would have worked anyway. confused

Hullygully Thu 18-Apr-13 12:09:01

I wonder if there really is much difference?

Some of us say we don't reward, but expect effort and then offer praise etc and the odd treat indirectly related to them staying on track, others are direct and directly link effort and reward.

It would be interesting to see what if any real difference it made.

wordfactory Thu 18-Apr-13 11:44:03

But tequila what about all the other targets in your life that have no financial reward?

The htings that are just intrinsically worth doing?

Aren't those things actually more akin to what our DC do at school?

Well personally I think it is different because they are children Tequila

Personally I prefer to preserve more of the innocence of childhood and not bring money into their endeavours so much. Plenty of time for that in adult life plus we're too broke to splash out much

But it's obviously something people have different approaches too.
I think by teens it's probably a good thing to begin introducing DC's to more of how things work in adult life/ the world of work.

I reward for good reports/good grades, yes.

If I work hard and hit my ridiculous targets at work, then I get a bonus at the end of the month.

Why is it different to reward DC's in the same way?

LaQueen Thu 18-Apr-13 10:52:54

I really don't think Life Is Shit at all, certainly not for our DDs.

seeker Thu 18-Apr-13 10:47:05

Our "pre new series of The Voice" event was epic!

wordfactory Thu 18-Apr-13 10:43:31

Same here seeker.

We like to make an occasion of the new series of Dr Who starting grin.

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