To think that if you want to go on Masterchef you must cook the following dishes:

(241 Posts)
muminthecity Wed 10-Apr-13 21:11:43

Starter:- Pan fried scallops with some sort of slop puree, preferably cauliflower. For extra points add a lump of black pudding.

Main:- Pan fried duck with some sort of fruit, orange, plum or redcurrants always go down well. Serve with either fondant/crushed potatoes and a red wine jus.

Pudding:- Chocolate fondant. Doesn't matter what you serve with it, if it works you will be hailed a genius regardless, if it doesn't, you will be sent home anyway.

If you want to be the wacky, 'inventive' one, add a bit of fruit to the scallops (apple maybe?), change the fruit you serve with the duck to a less conventional one (nectarine, perhaps?) and add some chilli to your chocolate fondant.

I love Masterchef but I'm so bloody sick of seeing the same dishes rehashed all the time!

"When I enter Masterchef, I am going to get through the first few rounds by cooking scallops and shit smears, then when it gets to the round where I have to do a 3 course meal for the critics I am going to make a prawn cocktail followed by spag bol, finished off with a fairy cake, or maybe a victoria sponge if I'm feeling generous."

I would watch that episode, muminthecity.

The mashed potato thing really annoys me. My mum's mashed potato always had the odd lump in it, and if my mum did it that way, it must be right. And all that sieving and mashing and pureeing must result in something that has the texture and flavour of potato glue. Yum. hmm

MortifiedAdams Wed 14-Aug-13 12:00:45

Well we've had balsamic and chocolate this time around. I mean, chilli and chocolate is so 2012.

Soverylucky - isn't deep-fried the alternative to pan-fried, hence the need for a term that makes the difference clear?

diamond211 Wed 14-Aug-13 10:49:30

There must also be a secret 'glue' ingredient which prevents Gregg from getting the food off his spoon easily...

Have you noticed how during the last rounds they also have to prepare, cook and serve a gourmet meal where the fridges are not in the kitchen but in some random place 3 miles away? Half their time is spent doing impressions of Ussain Bolt every few minutes smile

Elderflowergranita Wed 14-Aug-13 10:30:05

Yes! Greg's gone skinny though, so has had to restrain the orgasmic gurning over every pudding - it wouldn't gel with his weightwatchers contract.

Have only seen bits of it, but so far Janet Street Porter seems to be the token 'character'. Over the top belligerance; <can't stand 'pleasing men' apparantly> followed by a gruff reluctant softening after they comment favourably on a pile of beige slop she's concocted.

Emilythornesbff Wed 14-Aug-13 10:17:20

Isn't sleb master chef on again?
Couldn't resist reviving ths thread. Probably my favourite of all time.

StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes Sun 21-Apr-13 16:02:52

You can get samphire in Morrisons y'know. and ASDA smile tried it and its quite nice

MousyMouse Sun 21-Apr-13 14:29:08

I think the right persons went through.
I would like to see more challenging tasks, like vegan food or dairy free, or cooking for 2year olds at a nursery.

waterlego Sat 20-Apr-13 10:04:34

Love this thread smile

You can get samphire in Morrisons y'know.

MrsLyman Sat 20-Apr-13 09:47:37

Loving the thread. I always seem to scream try cooking for my 2 year old, everytime I hear 'cooking doesn't get tougher than this'

amicissimma Fri 19-Apr-13 22:55:09

Yay! Go, Saira - food in paperbags on Masterchef! All cooked through and not a smear in sight!

muminthecity Fri 19-Apr-13 21:28:39

I'm rooting for Natalie too, although Saira's meal was the one I'd most like to eat.

Kiriwawa Fri 19-Apr-13 21:13:13

Concur with Horry

Although I do have a soft spot for larks tongue

The thought of chicken 'lollipops' makes me heave. I'm sure they're perfectly nice, but, the name.

LaVolcan Fri 19-Apr-13 21:10:51

Yes! We had cuckoo spit (citrus air)
We had a slate with smears of stuff across it!

Tonight is bonkers.

Natalie ftw.

Magrathea Fri 19-Apr-13 20:53:31

*bowl wine arf

Magrathea Fri 19-Apr-13 20:50:49

greg ffs

Magrathea Fri 19-Apr-13 20:50:04

Wtff is a citrus air??

Greg lifted a goldfish Noel and sniffed it!

muminthecity Fri 19-Apr-13 20:41:27

Ooh and tonight one of our dishes is being served with 'citurs air.' Sounds delicious hmm

muminthecity Fri 19-Apr-13 20:38:48

Anyone watching tonight? It seems partridge is the new duck - 2 of them are doing it 'three ways.' Can't wait to see the shit streaks that will accompany them!

meddie Sat 13-Apr-13 11:26:04

www.youtube.com/watch?v=RI9OWm4r2QA

Has to be the ultimate MC deconstucted pud

We play the masterchef drinking game. Whenever John or Gregg say 'sauce' we have a glug drink a bottle of vodka. We get fairly pissed grin

Iaintdunnuffink Fri 12-Apr-13 23:45:17

Foam is Cuckoo spit.

MousyMouse Fri 12-Apr-13 23:39:32

urgh alex that put me off my chocolate tonight.

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