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AIBU?

to never to attend a social event where the woman with the Fecal Finger will be present.

71 replies

DIYWidow · 03/04/2013 17:06

The Fecal Finger of Fate has struck our family again.
Christmas was destroyed by a local lady with the shits who went to the pub and infected table - DH included and before fully recovered hosted a birthday party (got DD with her finger licking humous dipping ways).

I accepted a homemade chocolate brownie this weekend and six hours later felt the explosive power of her voodoo building in my colon.

Now we are not a 'delicate 'family but her ' it's good to be exposed to germs and stuff' attitude is destroying my holidays.

AIBU to avoid her purely on the grounds of health & hygiene?

OP posts:
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Pandemoniaa · 03/04/2013 17:09


May attempt sensible response when cleaned spat out tea off keyboard.
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sherazade · 03/04/2013 17:10

you accepted a brownie? how could you?

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AgentZigzag · 03/04/2013 17:10

Who is this Fecal Fingered woman?

And why did you accept anything made by her fair Fecal Fingered Hands after the pubs Table Of Doom?

Are you sure it's her though? These things get about don't they?

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anklebitersmum · 03/04/2013 17:12

are you utterly convinced it was germs and not an ex-lax brownie Confused

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Toasttoppers · 03/04/2013 17:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SPsFanjoTheBigStickyHaribo · 03/04/2013 17:14

Fecal finger Grin

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Coconutty · 03/04/2013 17:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AgentZigzag · 03/04/2013 17:15

I would have accepted it and given it to the Bin Monster.

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DIYWidow · 03/04/2013 17:19

Coconutty - I was n't thinking - Easter, chocolate, elevenses, Christmas an eon ago.

She prides herself on her culinary skills, she'll be there at bbqs 'helping in the kitchen', school cake bakes, a helpful pair of hands at a big Sunday lunch.

OP posts:
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midastouch · 03/04/2013 17:20

Well to be honest I'd have steered clear after the first instance! But then I don't eat food that other people have touched or possibly breathed on, yuck

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StealthPolarBear · 03/04/2013 17:25

Have I missed a thread?

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AgentZigzag · 03/04/2013 17:26

If you have, so have I SPB.

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AnyFucker · 03/04/2013 17:27

whaaaaaat ?

Grin

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Maat · 03/04/2013 17:30

Can you not install some type of sheep dip that she is made to swim through at the doorway of such events?

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MardyBra · 03/04/2013 17:31
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StealthPolarBear · 03/04/2013 17:32

Please can someone explain the back (passage) story?

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Pandemoniaa · 03/04/2013 17:33

But then I don't eat food that other people have touched or possibly breathed on, yuck

Do you live on air? Only all food has been touched and breathed upon at some stage.

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ImTooHecsyForYourParty · 03/04/2013 17:34

When you say brownie...

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StealthPolarBear · 03/04/2013 17:35

Is she some sort of superhero? Is the fecal finger her weapon of choice?

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MardyBra · 03/04/2013 17:35

Grin at Hecsy.

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thornrose · 03/04/2013 17:36
Confused
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Pandemoniaa · 03/04/2013 17:36

I'd definitely avoid her chocolate mousse.

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AgentZigzag · 03/04/2013 17:37
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CuppaTea83 · 03/04/2013 17:39

Utterly pissing myself at the thought of Fecal Finger woman ruining your life.
Sorry Blush

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Owllady · 03/04/2013 17:39

is it Helen on the PTA? I know her as well
she left a cardi at ours the once and we all developed impetigo within days

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