to not want to go to this wedding?

(23 Posts)
rollmopses Wed 06-Mar-13 08:38:33

Why the agony? Simply tell her that unfortunately you are unable to attend. Why do people feel so obligated to trot from wedding to wedding? Ghastly affairs, most of them.
Apart from family and best friends, one should never have to suffer the tedious proceedings or, worse, the utter vulgarity of such events.

[Grump]

fromparistoberlin Wed 06-Mar-13 08:28:08

what scumbag said!!!!!

ScumbagCollegeDropout Wed 06-Mar-13 07:41:41

YABU.

I went to a wedding last year as a single.

I hooked up with the only single bloke wink

Go have some fun!

MidnightMasquerader Wed 06-Mar-13 07:36:41

God knows when I go to a big knees-up like that, DH is not top of my list of people I want to spend the entire evening with!

Do you honestly think your friends are going to be all wrapped up in their husbands ... or looking forward to a good catch up and night out with friends?

You know the answer. wink

HollyBerryBush Wed 06-Mar-13 07:28:16

You can't hide away from other couples forever.

And you never know who you might meet there!

Ledkr Wed 06-Mar-13 07:23:28

This happened to me just after I split with dh. I felt just like you but went and had a lovely time. I hardly knew anyone but got chatting easily especially after a few wines then ended up really enjoying myself.
I wonder if you could as if. Friend could just come for the evening do so you've hot someone to hang out with. You will love it I bet and I've also heard that its a god place to meet a partner.

ZillionChocolate Wed 06-Mar-13 07:13:12

Yabu for the reasons above.

I think it's definitely worth mentioning it to your old friends. Might be worth checking with the bride if you can share travel with other guests, would be a good way of having some company/splitting the cost.

At weddings I find that there's quite often a gender divide, and past any formal bits women and men tend to separate. I'm sure that your old house mates will be looking forward to you all catching up, rather than talking to their own husband who they see all the time.

Take a deep breath and say you'll go!

yabu and weddings are a guest way to meet people. go out. mingle.

midastouch Tue 05-Mar-13 23:56:08

Go.. you never know you might meet somebody! I agree about the +1 no harm in asking?

MummytoKatie Tue 05-Mar-13 23:24:59

I have been with dh since 1999 but about 18 months ago I went to a wedding on my own due to a combination of childcare and holiday issues.

Full wedding including overnight stay. And all my friends are so paired up we are a little li,e Noah's Ark.

It was FAB!

I travelled with a couple so had someone to arrive with. I danced and did girly stuff with the girls. I drank port with the lads. I flirted (just a teeny tiny bit) with the best man.

Go!!!

bickie Tue 05-Mar-13 23:22:28

Go! My friend in similar situation met her wonderful DH at a wedding she was very scared about going to solo. But YANBU - very normal reaction.

TheSecondComing Tue 05-Mar-13 23:22:26

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Piemother Tue 05-Mar-13 23:18:49

I went to a friends wedding with about 5 married couples v soon after I separated. It was fine and mostly people just tried to look after me in a nice kind of clumsy way. I was pg too so feeling super self conscious and single. If these other couples are your friends they will understand and support you. If you are really feeling uncomfortable at least ring the other couples and tell them. They will want to keep you company more than likely

GregBishopsBottomBitch Tue 05-Mar-13 23:13:30

Ask the bride if you can take a friend, im single, so for my sisters wedding, i took my closest and longest friend to the wedding, you just gotta ask.

Iamsparklyknickers Tue 05-Mar-13 23:10:06

There are lots of reasons I would happily agree for anybody to avoid a wedding for (overpriced, overponced bloody parties grumble grumble) - this ain't one.

You want to see your friend get married, you've got enough people you know there to have a 'group' - go!

Don't let being single dictate what you will and won't do, it's all the same stuff, if you enjoy it when you've a bedwarmer you'll enjoy it without. Hell, treat yourself to an overnight hotel room and have room service breakfast in a bubble bath the next morning.

How would you feel sitting at home on the day knowing they were all there?

CloudsAndTrees Tue 05-Mar-13 23:09:44

It would be unreasonable not to support your friend and celebrate with her on a day that will be very special to her because you will be single. You are very unlikely to be the only single person there.

JollyGolightly Tue 05-Mar-13 23:07:19

YANBU to be a bit apprehensive about attending the wedding, but you would be very U to let that stop you going. Just go. I bet you have a fab time.

KC225 Tue 05-Mar-13 23:03:07

Agree with Plant - IT'S A WEDDING. Spruced up single men on their best behaviour - go get one ......

WorraLiberty Tue 05-Mar-13 23:02:19

I agree with aldi about the +1

It won't hurt to ask.

Have you been invited with a +1? Have you got another friend you could take along?

If not you could maybe speak to your other friends about how you are feeling so they make sure you aren't left alone.

aldiwhore Tue 05-Mar-13 23:00:22

I would ring the bride and see if, because you have no partner at present, you could bring a plus one? Take a friend.

I think YWBU to miss out, BUT I totally understand why you'd be anxious about being there alone.

I've known a few single people meet their future husbands at friend's weddings, so meh, who knows, you may actually have a ball! Also, if you Uni friends are together, if you're anything like me and mine, the partners will be subjected to hours of us rebonding and feeling a little left out, not YOU!

I would seriously consider enquiring whether you can bring a +1.

plantsitter Tue 05-Mar-13 23:00:01

YABU.

I always think a wedding invitation is an invitation not a summons, so you shouldn't go if you don't want to. But it's clear you do want to go! Is it possible there will be other people from Uni that you vaguely knew? Is it possible there will be a gorgeous single man there? Can you just get drunk and have a dance with your friends?

I think you would be silly not to go just because you think you will be the only single one there.

LoveYourSweater Tue 05-Mar-13 22:56:30

During uni I lived in a house of 5 women, one of them is getting married this year and we have all been invited. We have all stayed in touch and are good friends.

The other three women are all in long term committed relationships and will be bringing their partners ... and I broke up with my partner in October. No children are allowed either, which isn't a problem as my ex would have our DD that weekend anyway.

It's just I won't know anyone at the wedding (apart from the bride and groom) but the three women and their partners - I really don't want to be the only single one there. (We will have to stay overnight too as its a few hours away)

I know this is a stupid reason not to go as I do want to see my friend get married. Aibu to not go?

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